Things Aren't Always As They Appear

Aaaahhhh the Memories...

2009-01-23T07:24:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was awesome! We (Lucky-in-life, Upward Mobility, and Psych Ward, and I) were sitting in my dorm room just talking and some how, we started to reminisce about the joys of being a child

-like when you watched Face on Nick, Jr.
- Leon on the Puzzle Place, why give the black guy such a black-sounding name?? I loved it though!
-Alegra's Window, Gullah Gullah Island, Eureka's Castle, Barney, C-bear and Jamal, and countless others
-Geography
-Becoming the geniuses we are now, better let your (future) children read encyclopedias, then they might one day get our level...lol
-Those WONDERFUL books from childhood: Corduroy, Peter Rabbit,Where the Wild Things Are, and countless others
-My favorite books from childhood were often in Spanish, since I went to Spanish Magnets for most of my elementary education, but here's some of the English ones: Cloudy with a chance of Meatballs, Kat Kong, Dogzilla, Ralph S. Mouse: The Mouse and the Motorcycle...and especially Romona Quimby, Age 8
-Then laughing at the drama that seemed so large in high school, and now it makes you laugh because those would be great problems to have right now!
-reflecting on how it is still asking a lot to have to write a paper over a page...5 pages is still a daunting task...and I'm trying to go to law school...I need to get over this!!
-It's also so weird that after this year...I won't know anyone at my old schools...isn't that crazy?? I have known folks the graduating class of 2000...now I won't know any AT ALL...WILD!!!

(Contented sigh) to Be able to go back for just a day with this knowledge intact...how odd things would be!

Good Riddance to Bad Rubbish

2009-01-20T09:21:00.000-08:00

And A New Era Dawns!

2009-01-20T05:45:00.000-08:00

(LiveBlogging the Inauguration of Pres. Barack Obama)

NOTE: All times are Eastern Standard Time

8:46 AM: The Obama Family is on CP time, 10 minutes late to their own church service. Thank Gawd I'm not in DC, the lines on the Metro are outrageous! and it's 17 DEGREES! I love the jubilation of the crowds! And they are so diverse, yet...I seem to see a much darker hue than in any of the others I've seen.

8:49 AM: They have finally left, thank goodness the ride to St. John's was only about 45 secs. (If this were any other President-Elect, I would want them to walk...but he needs as much protection as we can afford.) And Mrs. Obama is looking GREAT!!! in a very nice, yellow-ish/gold-ish dress with an ankle length jacket of the same color, there appears to be bead work, or sequence. T.D. Jakes(of Dallas, Founder of the Potter's House Mega-Church) will give the sermon for this morning's service. Yolonda Adams is set to perform, and The Rev. Otis Moss Jr (on the board of trustees for my school, former chair of the BoTs) will give the invocation.

8:57 AM: These ladies from Louisiana perform the "Obama Song": Son of a Gun, Crawfish Fun, we'll have fun on the Bayou...Son of a Gun, Crawfish Fun, We'll have fun on the MA-ALLL...kind of a cute little ditty...since they were older ladies from the Bayou.

9:15 AM: John Lewis shares what this means to him on CNN.

10:00 AM: The Obamas, and the Bidens, have left St. Johns Church, and crossed the street to have coffee with President and Mrs. Bush at the White House, America's House!!

11:40 AM: Rev. Rick Warren, of the Saddleback Church and Purpose Driven life Fame, offered the invocation.

11:46 AM: Aretha Franklin regales the assembly with America (My Country 'Tis of Thee)

11:58 AM: Joe Biden is sworn in by Justice John Paul Stevens of the U.S. Supreme Court.

12:00 PM: BARACK OBAMA Just Became President of the United States without the oath, according to the Constitution. Sen Dianne Fienstien, Chair of the Congressional inaugural Committee introduces a musical ensemble including Yo Yo Ma, the violinist.

12:05 PM: Chief Justice John Roberts swears in Senator Obama as the President!!

12:07 PM: Sen Fienstien Introduces to the world the 44th President of THESE UNITED STATES!!

12:08 PM: PRESIDENT Obama begins his speech:
Thanks Bush for service and Cooperation
He rebuffs those feeling the failure of the USA is eminent
He kinda tempers the feelings of those who see him as some savior, and tells
us that we will have to make sacrifices, avoid shortcuts, be courageous, and
take risks, get down and dirty to make these promises real.

12:13 PM: We must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off and start the work of rebuilding America.
Affordable Health care, Energy reform, Education reform
Not is Government too big or too small...but is it efficient?? is it Transparent??

12:16 PM: we must not deny our principles in favor of safety in a false dilemma

12:19 PM: Our Patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness!

12:26 PM: We carried forth that great gift of Freedom!!!

12:27 PM: Elizabeth Alexander, Inaugural Poet: Praise song for the Day

12:32 PM: Rev. Joseph Lowery, co founder of the SCLC, gives the benediction...he used Lift every Voice, And Sing as the intro to his prayer! He prayed for Obama's success in this "high Office, and a low Moment!" He prayed to get rid of the exploitation of the poor, the least of these...and rid us of the favor of the rich, the ELITE of these!

12:38 PM: the National Anthem

1:03 PM: President Obama signs official nomination papers, and a declaration of national renewal. the cabinet Secretary Designates are now officially Nominees.

1:27 PM: The Congressional leadership enters Statuary hall,

1:28 PM: The Vice President and Mrs. Biden enter Statuary Hall

1:29 PM: The President and Mrs. Obama enter Statuary hall, for the congressional luncheon.

1:34 PM: The Blessing for the Congressional Luncheon is said, cameras are no longer allowed in...the luncheon is private for it's 200 guests.

1:54 PM: President and Mrs. Bush leave Andrews Air Force Base for their new life and home in Dallas, TX aboard a private jet.

2:00 PM: I got a phone call...missed everything else

To Synch, or NOT To Synch...that is the question

2009-01-16T18:30:00.000-08:00

So, I am that person that really hates to log into my email on my computer and see a whole lot of emails that I needed earlier in the day. So, I have chosen to synch my three most often checked accounts to my Sidekick, I think this is a great idea most of the time...but lately...all of the emails with deals from places I shop have been coming to my phone. I hate nothing more than being reminded how BROKE I am...and when I say BROKE....I mean BROKE!!!!! also, it drains my battery something fierce...

SO, good people of the blogosphere...should I keep it synched? OR LET IT GO?? Do you have yours synched?

The Prayer of Jabez...it works indeed!

2009-01-16T09:07:00.000-08:00

Donald Lawrence Bless Me (Prayer Of Jabez) - Donald Lawrence
And Jabez called on the God of Israel saying, "Oh that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!" So God granted him what he requested. (NKJV) 1 Chronicles 4:9-10

I don't know about yours...but...MY GAWD WORKS!!!!! Indeed He does!I will be staying at my school! I'm truly blessed, and will now be working hard to prove that I am grateful for this great gift! I'm aiming for a 4.0, to prove to these folks that they made the right decision in giving me another chance, and I'm so at peace with my religion at this moment...maybe that was the reason for all of this...to show me how it feels when I rely too much on my own understanding. I need to let go, and let God more often...and I will!

Peace and Blessings,

Bobby_2010

Is This the End of It Already?

2009-01-07T21:15:00.000-08:00

I recently told you guys about the troubles I'm having with my education. Well, Today I was informed that i did indeed have my scholarship revoked. I am not sure why it took so long for them to inform me of this decision. I mean, the semester ended about a month ago, and now it's a week before school there starts(Wednesday), and a few days before classes start at the potential school(Monday). The man that informed me told me I have until Friday to send in my appeal, I sent one in in December, but I guess they can't be bothered to retrieve the appeal I sent in previously...I guess I'll go send it in again right now.

I am so upset about this because I will not be able to continue my education as an African American Studies Major, and I also will have to tack on at least another semester to my undergrad career because most of my credits won't transfer to my new school as I will now be a History major Pre-MAE...and I haven't really concentrated in history at my current/former school. I am sad to say this, but I feel an odd sense of relief now that I have at least gotten an answer, but then again I'm slightly depressed att he same time...but it's really about having to change things prematurely...btu it must be noted...I DID NOT get kicked out of school, I am still in good standing, I just can't afford to get this education at this school that costs 34000 dollars per year...I mean I can't even get the loans to cover it.

I told some of my friends at school, but Chaos-in-Motion wore me out. I told him and he said that I can't leave because he doesn't want things to change. I thinks it's crazy how he can only see how this thing affects him. He said it's only money, and that this thing is bigger than money. He also said it's about more than education...but not for 34000 dollars per year. at this pint, it's all about making it to law school...fuck everything else...I love my friends, but I gotta go and do what I gotta do. I had a fun 2.5 yrs there, but there are bigger fish to fry(LSAT, LAW SCHOOL, and eventually this PhD). Pray for me...as I move down this new path in the wilderness.

This is what it's all about the the road to manhood, the road less traveled!

Did I Miss Something...a Memo Maybe?

2009-01-03T20:44:00.000-08:00

I just do not understand why people think it's okay to question my faith. I mean, I expect it from some people, like my married friend, my grandmother, and my uncle that is a deacon. But from my BFF? I mean, I expected that even if you didn't agree with my views, you would still respect ME enough to discuss them without making charges that I'm lukewarm in my beliefs. I mean, I try to base my beliefs off what I read in the Bible, with my own eyes. I am also an American, so I truly believe in a separation of church and state. i believe that our Constitution was meant to protect the minority from the whims of the majority. I do NOT see any issue with this. I feel that as a Christian, fighting for HUMAN RIGHTS is a major part of why I am here. I also believe that the government should not be allowing the whims of "religious" hate mongers to prevent certain groups from participating in CIVIL ceremonies. I would never try to force a church to perform a gay wedding, I would never force a racist to perform an interracial wedding, but I DO expect officials to uphold the US Constitution and allow persons to exercise their UNALIENABLE rights, despite how I, or anyone feels about it. I feel that I am following in the footsteps of Christ when I stand up for those that are abused by members of our society that happen to be in the mainstream. Jesus hung out with the hated tax collectors, and at least one unclean woman.

I do not see why there is an issue with my questioning the things that do not make sense to me. But I guess because I try to get other perspectives on my questions some folks take it as the only reason I read is so that I can have more ammo to go against the "FAITH." it's not like that, I mean I read the Bible and there are some things that are at perfect peace with my heart, and there are others that are not. I feel that since I have been created with this mind, I can question things until they are explained in a satisfactory way. I'm so over it...this whole "religion" thing...I just wanna do me...why can't other folks just let me alone??

I'm sorry to ramble, but I had to put this out here so I could see it and get my words together before I attempt to go and make nice with my BFF...

Happy Honda (or Holi-, if you aren't in the market for a car) Days!

2009-01-02T00:54:00.000-08:00

Had a blast with the buds! Just like high-school times, we were all sober the whole time! And folks(read: Ms. (im)Perfection) think i can't have fun without alcohol! Here's hoping the New Year brings less drama, and head-/heartache!!!

And this is to you, Blagojevich, Burris, and Rush

2009-01-02T00:53:00.000-08:00

Random Funnies...lmao

2008-12-23T21:27:00.000-08:00

Quotes:

"Ripley's Bitch. Believe it or not." read in the comments of this post

"Bitch! We in da Bayou!" Crazy ass friend

"Don't inTERupt...RUUDE!" Bon Qui Qui (hint: it's the first video below)

Videos:

Path to the Future

2008-12-21T20:13:00.000-08:00

So I went shopping for some jeans yesterday, I was so appalled! I have gained so much weight! I need to make some changes seriously...I'm working on developing a plan to get back to at least the weight I was in high school. I'm so out of shape. I need to get back into the gym...I might have to take Chaos-n-Motion up on his idea to join this gym back in the school town.

Also, I'm thinking I'm gonna buy a tennis racket and play with Ms. (im)Perfection, that way we can work out together. We also decided that we are gonna stop our late night runs to Checker's, but we're still gonna go to Ru San's and eat sushi...that shit is good. lol

Bitch, We in da Bayou!!

2008-12-20T22:47:00.000-08:00

So I have been going through! I am in jeopardy of losing my scholarship, and having to transfer to the local university. This is disheartening because I will basically be starting over, this potential school doesn't offer a major or a minor in African American Studies...which is what I'm majoring in now. Also, I will be living at home...so there will be no more partying, no friends, and no girlfriend(since she just transferred to my current school's sister school next door). I am so hurt by this because this is the semester I worked my hardest since coming to college, and to suffer such a set-back is beyond depressing. I don't have money, and I don't know if I'll be continuing my education the way I planned...life could be so much worse, I'm sure, but it feels really shitty right about now.

On another note: My family is so FOS...So I've been spending time with my one of my BFFs...and both of them are girls. My family tries to make me feel guilty about the amount of time I spend with them. They have brought it up before...and I've spoken to Ms. (im)Perfection about it...she said that she is fine with the amount of time I spend with them...especially because I see her at school now and only see them for a week or two every few months. I have even gone so far as to make sure I am home by 10 PM every time I go out with the BFFs...this is even when Ms. (im)Perfection is at work and unavailable to hang out with me...IDK, is it excessive to spend almost all day with my female best friends when my girl is at work? I think of them as like my similarly aged siblings, and I am only interested in making things work with Ms. (im)Perfection right now...

Tagged...yet, again.

2008-12-15T19:47:00.000-08:00

So, I guess it's about time to start blogging again...and to start off...I'll make this list that I was tagged to do by Dbaby, and TGITG. I'm guessing that I am supposed to just list some random things about myself...IDK, really, but that's what it'll be.

7. I am really good at giving advice, but I'm horrible at following my own advice...hell, I rarely follow any advice...

6. I am a little lost now that I'm not basically the smartest person I know...it's kinda scary.

5. I sometimes wonder why my friends still bother to deal with me...I've realized I'm a mean ass bastard

4. I really feel torn about how to feel about being a virgin at 20...damn-near 21...especially when I'm closest to the folks who aren't virgins in my group...I hate feeling left out of the convos

3. I really Have NO clue what I'm to do in life...I see so many paths...but no clear roads...

2. I have damned food addiction...I'm seriously thinking that I might.

1. I like drinking, but i don't wanna...I'm scared I may be a worse parent than the ones I've seen...and I feel like alcohol will be the end of my "bright future" as folks like to call it...

WHY is this my life?

2008-11-17T12:09:00.000-08:00

I am swamped with school, I just thought of a topic for my paper that is due on thursday(after weeks spent looking through sources), I am so BROKE...but Friday is pay day. and this is the final full week fo school, so I have a couple of weeks to get my life together and eeek out an acceptable GPA!

In other HORRID news, I failed a course required for my major, I withdrew, so it's no problem of bringing down my GPA but, and here's the kicker, I have to take 15 hours each semester to keep my scholarship...I'm only taking 12 hours now...but if i had stayed in the class and failed I would've been in worse condition...so WHAT am I TO DO?? Can't really stress about it now.

Also, I think I may be in trouble as far as grades go anyway, because of my spotty attendance! I REALLY HATE GOING TO THIS TINY SCHOOL at times! why do we have to have attendance policies? if I don't feel like going to class that should be my prerogative!

but other than that, life is great! lol, I can't even take myself seriously saying this....since this is my life...and it's SCREWED up...my life is, in essence, screwed up! HELP ME!!!

Fucking Hilarious

2008-11-07T18:49:00.001-08:00

Sometimes

2008-11-06T18:04:00.000-08:00

This is inspired by a post I saw on The Baby Daddy Diaries.

Sometimes...I feel like a nut.
Sometimes...I don't.
Sometimes...I just wanna quit.
Sometimes...I wanna cry.
Sometimes...it's too hard.
Sometimes...I just have to laugh at it.
Sometimes...I wonder why.
Sometimes...I don't feel like answering the phone.
Sometimes...I just don't care.
Sometimes...I get sick of everyone.
Sometimes...I get sick of everything.
Sometimes...I want to be alone.
Sometimes...I'm overjoyed!
Sometimes...I need you around.
Sometimes...I feel undeserving of the blessings.
Sometimes...I just need to be myself.
Sometimes...I need to realize my own limits.
Sometimes...I care entirely too much.
Sometimes...I long for the days when I was carefree.
Sometimes...I smile for no (apparent) reason.
Sometimes...I need help.
Sometimes...I want to give up and go home.
Sometimes...I feel like a failure.
Sometimes...I feel so LOST!
Sometimes...i pray it through.
Sometimes...I feel so confused.
Sometimes...I feel like me...a blogger called Bobby_2010...

And history has been made!

2008-11-05T08:41:00.000-08:00

I, too, sing America.

I am the darker brother.
They send me to eat in the kitchen
When company comes,
But I laugh,
And eat well,
And grow strong.

Tomorrow,
I'll be at the table
When company comes.
Nobody'll dare
Say to me,
"Eat in the kitchen,"
Then.

Besides,
They'll see how beautiful I am
And be ashamed--

I, too, am America.

This would SUCK ASS!!

2008-11-03T21:53:00.001-08:00

Don't let it be you!!

a little encouragement

2008-11-02T13:36:00.000-08:00

"The world bursts at the seams with people ready to tell you you're not good enough. On occasion, some may be correct. But do not do their work for them. Seek any job; ask anyone out; pursue any goal. Don't take it personally when they say 'no' -- they may not be smart enough to say 'yes.' " --Keith Olbermann

insanely funny

2008-10-30T22:15:00.001-07:00

I want this....SSSOoooooooooooo BAD!!!`

2008-10-21T23:46:00.001-07:00

And Secretly...you do too!! But I'm not about to change to Verizon anytime soon(at least not for the next two years), so i won't be able to get it!

20 Something Bloggers, as you Requested

2008-10-21T22:50:00.000-07:00

So 20 Something Bloggers wanted us all to do a video blog post and here is my contribution(this WILL NOT become a regular thing!!):

Whew!! Glad the wait is over!!

2008-10-20T07:38:00.000-07:00

Y'ALL!!! I have been going through! Being broke is no joke, but it is made all the worse when you are owed money by someone who has it and refuses to give it to you! Well, that was my life dealing with this freakin' school, waiting on this refund!! It was a saga! I was promised it Thursday, then I gave them until Friday evening...and was on edge all of Saturday, and Sunday....OH, Sun-DAYEEEE...I was ready to head to the top of the parking deck and JUMP!!! I really was so over life at that point! But that has all changed, I FINALLY got my DAMN money today! and in the words of the notorious The Artist, "Imma poarty, and Imma eat!" Seriously...with Homecoming around the corner..I need Shoes, a new suit, and I have pay for tickets to all of the shit and I also have to buy plane tickets and play tickets(I'm going to see WICKED!!!)and a whole bunch of other shit...but I clearly have shit to do...so I bid you, o blogosphere, adieu!

So life has soem great, funny moments...

2008-10-15T17:18:00.000-07:00

and they are best when shared with friends! As I sit here "studying" (by which I mean, watching tv and surfing the net), I =keep seeing this Target commercial and I love the song they played in it, it's called More Where That Came From by Dolly Parton...and it is hilarious. I have posted the video below!

Have you seen this?? I am shocked and appalled!

2008-10-10T08:25:00.000-07:00

So I was doing my usual perusal of news and ran across a CNN story about moms who support Sarah Palin, the main "character" in the article was this woman who started a blog supporting her, Moms 4 Sarah Palin. I had to comment on it.

and here is what I said:

So, it's alright for conservatives, like Anne Coulter and Sean Hannity, and Tucker Carlson to deride my beliefs and act as though I am a complete idiot for having beliefs of my own. But it's wrong if a "liberal" or "left-winger" leaves scathing remarks?

And I seriously do NOT understand how anyone can support Gov. palin, when we don't know anything that she believes. And it's sad when one can be made fun of, using an exact quote. look at her, and listen to her, she thinks he proximity to Russia is a qualification for the presidency, if a liberal candidate said something so absurd, they would be vilified and run out of town by the Right-wing maniacs that DO exist.

Personally, I think that these right-wing, neo-con, ideologues are ruining America. What ever happened to separation of church and State? And how did we let a bunch of rich folks that don't care about our faith high-jack it and turn it against us? The Republican party has appealed to religious beliefs, and all the while used our faith to convince us to vote for policies that only harm our country: like invading Iraq, while at the same time cutting domestic help spending.

but the best of luck when America goes down in Flames because you big-government, deficit-loving, "conservatives" refuse to face reality and vote for someone who actually has a vision and doesn't change with the blowing of the wind!

I see why She is a Phenomenon, now

2008-10-06T11:24:00.000-07:00

The week from hell!!!

2008-10-05T19:58:00.000-07:00

SO this was definitely not my week! I lost 100 dollars that I don't have and now need, I didn't even get the letter of recommendation for this organization I want to join, I didn't get a workstudy job, and to top it all off...My FUCKING Refund is still not here yet!! So what the FUCK am I to do?? I swear, things felt like they couldn't get worse, but, alas they did: my phone is technically out of service, but I can still get incoming communiques.

I am hating all of this drama! I just wanna go to class, eat some good food, watch some nice tv, and chillax on the weekends. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?? I am so over this place...this city sucks, and my school sucks ass most of the time!

I am about ready to fire these suckas on my e-board for the Af-Am Studies Club: this Tuesday will be our fourth "FIRST" general Body meeting...WTF?? I mean I have an e-board so that everything doesn't fall on one person! I mean I made the fliers, why the fuck can't you print them and post them, without me micro-managing shit?? I mean I told the VP to call an e-board meeting, this fool completely ignored me and I had to call it...if I'm doing it all, I'll do it all and get rid of the dead weight! The Treasurer is not doing shit that I ask him to, I need to put together a damn budget so that I can go get appropriations and this fool will not go meet with our adviser to figure out the shit to put on the paper...Just go sit down and write!! and then give the shit to the VP, and please go and get a damn Treasurer's report form the damn business office...not the same one that I gave you from MAY!!!

This rant is over...I am so worn out by this shit...and I'm about over it...if too much else goes wrong...I'm gonna need to go on the watch!!

Throwback Friday

2008-10-04T08:42:00.000-07:00

I know I have been MIA and haven't really written anything, but soon, I promise!! In the meantime, listen to these throwbacks, I feel like these are inspirational (you be the judge).

And Kanye continues to kill it!!!

2008-09-29T18:46:00.000-07:00

Where does he come up with this shit?? I love it though!!

Kanye is my boy...even with his erratic ass behavior!

And that is some shit for yo ass

2008-09-22T16:22:00.000-07:00

Throw back Friday

2008-09-19T09:40:00.000-07:00

Where the Chilly Winds Don't Blow

2008-09-18T08:56:00.000-07:00

I am so nervous, I am so scared, I am crushed, put me on the watch!! (you know damn well, which watch I'm talkin about!!) I just got the blow of my collegiate career...and it is really hurting me. I'll talk about it more in a few months, b/c there is still time to work it out! I just have to work harder, and hopefully all will be well! But it really hurts right now! But I have to go to class, so I'll sulk another time! Time to get back on the grind!!!

Title taken from: Chilly Winds Don't Blow by Nina Simone

Fuck the Recession, Don't Let it FUCK You!

2008-09-17T07:42:00.000-07:00

In the infamous words of Upward Mobility. I mean we keep talking about a damn recession, so what do people do?? Stop spending money....WHY?? THIS IS A CONSUMER ECONOMY!! I mean please do save, but shit...you gotta buy stuff if you want there to be jobs here. Rush the banks to take all your money out?? FUCK NAW!!! leave that shit in there, if we all rush the banks we WILL have another depression! and that is some shit for yo ass!!!! I mean it...spend money, save some too, and let some of your bank money sit...I personally don't do the whole homelessness thing. But I guess if shit gets too hard, I'll join the band wagon and do some hoe ass shit on Craiglist. I hope it doesn't come to that, but as the title stated: FUCK THE RECESSION DON'T LET IT FUCK YOU!!!!

That's all...(from my homie Miranda, who wears Prada)

Wonderful Weekend

2008-09-14T13:53:00.000-07:00

This weekend was a great! I mean it is actually the first time I can remember going each day of the weekend and not getting pissed at someone! I really had fun on Friday, with Upward Mobility, The Young Lady, and another friend, Naldo. We went to dinner and it was actually quite fun! and it's always fun to hang with fellow bloggers!! I got to speak to Drangry! I miss her dearly! I also spoke to Pink Blossoms and Dria da Diva! I can't wait to be reunited with these guys!! But back to Friday, I have realized I need sleep! I stayed up until 5:30 AM talking to Upward Mobility and Naldo...about nothing important! But I have come to appreciate being able to experience that sort fo thing, I mean we have come up with plans to take over the world...not just the city, but the World Craig(OOOPS! I mean reader), and it was quite fun!

I slept most of Saturday, When i did get up finally, it was to help the Artiste move into his new Apartment. And then to dinner, and then the Footbal game, whcih I'm happy to report, we won!! And then to the Bowling Alley! i bowled like 4, maybe 5 strikes, we only got up to 8 frames...i was pretty dang excited about those strikes!! And Lucky was trying to hate on my technique...WACK!! and then we went to Malpractice's Apartment, I really like his girlfriend...she is so nice!! But I still don't like being around him, b/c it makes me feel bad about how I act towards him. But I'm gonna try something new, just try to check my self...and keep our communication to a minimum, that way i don't have to worry about talking to him crazy!

I got up this morning and went to Church...it was amazing! and I should let you know why it was such a big deal, I have been questioning whther or not my personal values are in conflict with the values of the churches I have been attending, and whether that is reflective of the kinds of issues other folk go through when trying to reconcile progressive ideals with the inherently conservative(if nto regressive) tendencies of the Christian community. but I am trying to work thorugh it...pray for me!

And this is hotness..

2008-09-14T13:47:00.000-07:00

I usually don't like stuff like this, but this was hot!! I have to give credit where it's due, I heard this on the Black Girl in the City's page, check her out! And I do realize that I'm probably way beyond old on get this!

7 Years Later

2008-09-11T12:40:00.000-07:00

I can remember sitting in my favorite middle school class, American History. It was fourth period and we had this HUGE tv in the classroom. I had never even heard of the World Trade Center, I did know what the Pentagon was though(My dad is an ex-sailor). I just remember hearing folks saying that we were under attack, i didn't quite realize how huge the US is at that time. SO i figured that if it happened in NYC and the DC area, we were at risk too. It didn't help that some dumbass was saying that the next targets would be the schools with the smartest students, I was at the best school in the area...so we were all trying to get home. they herded us into the cafeteria and pulled out all the kids with connections to NYC, or DC. My friend couldn't get in contact with his dad, who was scheduled to fly to NYC early that morning...so we were all scared, it turns out he didn't even leave and came up to the school to reassure my buddy...we were all relieved.

But as time went on, I felt bad for the Muslim kids in my school, b/c folks were already acting rude to them talking about how they were terrorists. These were kids that we had known for a few years and hung out with regularly(well, not me, but the other kids...I didn't hang out when i was younger). I will admit...I had never flown and was not looking forward to ever doing it, and now clearly I try to fly everywhere that more than an 8-hour drive! Funny how things change! I was almost late class trying to watch the Pentagon ceremony, that memorial is nice!!

It's Kinda Funny How Life Works...

2008-09-10T22:35:00.000-07:00

I was sitting here reflecting on how much stuff has changed from when I first came to this school three years ago. I mean i had no friends, I was looking for a place to transfer to that would be closer to home. I had never had ginger ale before, I had never been to the South before, and I had never had to be without my family on Holidays.

Now I routinely drink ginger ale(usually mixed with other things, but it is good alone too!), I basic live in the South, I stay down here for at least 9 months of every 12, and I only spend three holidays with my family(Christmas, New Year's, and Memorial Day). I have sort of adopted a pseudo-family in my friends. I mean I spend more time with these sickos than I do with my actual family! I have grown to love folks that I loathed, I've had those falling-outs that all families have, and I have grown apart from some I was close to, and grown closer to some that i had distant relationships with at first. Things are changing, and I think all for the better.

I have been doing some introspection, and I have realized that I'm a horrible friend to Malpractice. I don't know exactly why, but I think it has ot do with jealousy(he is from a relatively wealthy family, and he's not a virgin; while I am from a poor family, and I am still a virgin). And since I'm such a bad friend to him, I feel even worse b/c his new girlfriend asked him if I was his best friend, and he said yes...I felt like shit!! And that just makes me dislike him more! I need help, btu really, he should just cut me loose, he shouldn't put up with this shit!

But on the other hand, Psych Ward and I have become like borthers, he confides in me and I in him. I think it may have something to do with our similar backgrounds, neither of us comes from money, and the current home situations aren't necessarily the best. But we are both determined to make it!

I think that this line of thinking, being mean and rude to the more well-off of my friends, and nicer, more caring to the less well-off among them, is a habit with me. I mean, IDK what is going on! I have some thinking to do, or maybe I should do some pruning, and cut folks out...btu that wouldn't solve anything, would it? I guess I have to do some soul searching...wish me luck.

Insanely FUNNY!!!

2008-09-07T13:03:00.000-07:00

It's the Small Things That Make Life Great

2008-09-07T12:38:00.001-07:00

Last night about 11:45 me, Ms. (im)Perfection, Psych Ward, and Upward Mobility decided to go to get some of the best pizza I have ever had, from this local place. I mean the pizza was great, but the convo was wonderful!! I wish I could remember what it was about, but since we talk in circles and randomly select topics, I won't even hurt my self trying. I will say that I have the best folks on earth surrounding me! We have all changed so much, and I have learned that first impressions are usually misleading. because I definitely started off hating Psych Ward and Upward Mobility, and now they are some of my favorite people on earth!

I really wish that I hadn't wasted most of yesterday, I have a ton of work to do this weekend, a ton of reading, and I still need to do some laundry. I am such a SLACKER!!!!! I guess, I'll write more when i can clear my mind and put together real sentences.

O, BTW...Malpractice's Ex-gf, is a true bitch...her status was raw on Facebook: I laughed but then I thought about the fact that it was my boy, who had done everything he could to help her in her sick, twisted, and dimented life. And this chick has the nerve to write this:(insert name) hopes it's not dysfunctional this go round lmao I finally found someone who knows what the hell he's doing :-).
THEN she wrote this: let me stop lmao.

and THEN this: deon was right, a true man (....boy, really) could not do someone as dirty as he did. I can't be mad at no one but myself abd learn.

Now she says he did her wrong...he bought her a phone, let her move in with him, and then let her stay once they broke up...and then she talks all kinds of shit this summer, and now b/c he refuses to put up with her shit and has moved to another (real) woman she is acting funny...where do these crazy folks come from??

Things Are Looking Up

2008-09-03T08:44:00.000-07:00

I now have electricity, they came beating down the door at 9:15 this morning. I will have classes, turns out that the external scholarship place had asked for my information early this summer and the school didn't tell them about my progress, so they didn't send any money...I will still have to go and raise hell, because I'm not paying this damn late registration fee...that is damn book money! I don't even have time for that!! I really don't think it is my fault if the school didn't give them the information they requested, and I had done my part. But at least I won't be getting put back outta school!

More later!

Why Do They Make It So Hard??

2008-09-02T08:40:00.001-07:00

I love my school in terms of classes, social opportunities, and overall
theme of mission. But I DO NOT love the way the school is run. Why do we
have to go to financial aid every semester? Or even every year? I mean I
have gotten the same awards for going on three years now, if anything
I've added awards, not subtracted! But somehow Even I got sucked into
the stupidity! I don't understnd what's going on! I mean the school pays
my tuition and my external scholarship and loan pay for evrything else,
what's going on? I mean why wait until the late registration period to
drop my classes? Drop them before, if you have to be stupid and drop
them. And conveniently, no one knows where I need to go to deal with
this shit!

But on another note, I have had no internet connection since I moved in
on August 24, 2008. I can deal with this, but now all of the outlets in
my room are inoperable! WTF??? I mean I can't when for losing! But
hopefully, I will be done with this drama soon! And there will be a
happy post, if all works out!
--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

And This Is The Welcome I Get???

2008-08-27T12:51:00.001-07:00

This is so WACK! I like my new dorm room. I like that Ms. (im)Perfection
transferred down here, I love being near my friends again, I'm loving
the fact that I have the chance to change some things...but I hate that
I have no sort of internet connection in my room! I mean what am I
supposed to do without the interwebs at my fingertips! What, you want me
to read a book? I don't think so, well until I get a reading assignment
anyway. ;) but this whole blogging on the phone thing is wearing my
thumbs out...so, I bid you adieu! Hopefully things will look better in a
few days!
--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

Friends...the Best people on Earth

2008-08-22T20:42:00.000-07:00

Tell me why Meeks randomly called me to go shopping with her to get "school supplies" from this Art supply store that has been having some good sales. And the sale was pretty good...she spent much less than she had expected. But that is not the point of this! We shop, leave and decide to stop by her house before she drops me off and heads to school. As we are sitting at this light, a car pulls up next to us and a little boy in the front seat looks over at us and laughs, so we decide (independently) to "dance" and entertain this young man...when we both started dancing it to two completely different musical tempos...it was hilarious! I wish you had been there! I swear we made that little boy's WEEK..maybe even his month....too bad you can't say things like that!

Also, I just checked in for my Flight back down to the South. I've never done online check-in, it was interesting. I also found out that I can check a box...I thought "baggage" had to be bags...maybe I'm a little slow, but this is only the 10th flight I've taken in my life...and all the other times I was allowe to check two bags, and My big bag wasn't too big to check! So there( real kindergarten, right??)!

Food,Oh How I Love Thee...and this is the whole problem

2008-08-16T21:48:00.000-07:00

Why did I just get overly excited about the fact that I found my Favorite ice cream flavor(Butter Brickle) today? I mean, it is becoming more and more clear to me that I have an unhealthy relationship with food. I sit up and think of wonderful spreads of food as entertainment, I watch(ed) the food network religiously, until the Olympics started. I talk about food almost constantly, and I am always wondering about my next meal...this is not the worst. I have turned going out to eat into a hobby...or is it an addiction? I mean this would be different if it was like alcohol or cocaine, but this is an addiction to something I can't live without. I mean When Gram wanted to quit smoking she stopped cold turkey, if I do that with food, it just opens up another flood gate. I am not ready to become anorexic, and that really wouldn't be a good look for me anyway. I have to do something, and the crazy thing is...it's so much easier when I'm at school. Probabaly b/c i rarely like anything they serve in the caf. I really need to go, and also, when I'm with Ms (im)Perfection, I tend to eat less, and to eat better things when i do eat more...I guess maybe I can only eat at school or with her forever...not so bad...I guess...but I'm gonna stop obsessing and enjoy this Butter Brickle (well, I already paid for it, why not eat it and I've already got a bowl in front of me, so just DROP it)

this video speaks to my unhealthy predicament...just think of the subject being food...it is also a shout out to Angie and Dria...enjoys homies...I will always miss our little dance hours after long days at work (sniffles)!

I think I might have...

2008-08-15T21:27:00.000-07:00

Seriously...I think that I some form of dementia. I mean, why else would i forget almost everything? The short-term memory is just about non-existent! I got on here to write about something I was thinking about earlier, and only five minutes elapsed between the thought and the signing into Blogger. I hate this...and I'm READY TO GO!!! I have so many great folks to hang out with!!

It's not so bad...

2008-08-15T01:38:00.000-07:00

So, I'm basically alone in my hometown. I mean I have my family, but SHE is gone, as are all of my friends except for like one or two...and they are leaving in the next few days...so I have a whole WEEK left at home and nothing to do except go to breakfast with one of my high school classmates.

So I'm trying not to be upset that SHE is gone, because I mean she's going to the same place that I'll be in next Saturday, but HELL I wish she could've just left when I left! I guess she didn't really have a choice since she transfered to the Sister School and has to go to orientation. But I mean things are gonna get a lot better once I get down there, then we will not have all of the distractions and intruders that we have at home. Also, from now on SHE will be known as Ms. (im)Perfection. This is because her imperfections and eccentricities are what make us so compatible, and also kinda volatile. I helped her pack her truck today so she can drive down in the morning...well I guess to drive down in a few ours...I wish I could go with her, but my dorm does NOT open until the 24th...so I have nowhere to stay...and her momma ain't having that Bobby_2010 stay in the same hotel room thing. Also, her grandma, who loves me, threatened to come down to where we go to school and shoot up the entire city if I don't take care of Ms. (im)Perfection! And the crazy thing is, I kinda believe her! (Shivers, and teeth chatter)

Back to this friend that will still be here after all the others leave. He goes t the local university, and we met in 8th grade. Now I truly consider(ed?) him a friend, but this will be the first time I have ever hung out with him outside of a school function, a HIGH school function...I graduated three years ago. I mean...WTF is that about?? Anyway, I guess we are rectifying this...but it seems odd to me.I can't even imagine what the convo will be about as we eat breakfast...but I'm trying to come up with talking points, here are a few

college life so far
activities this summer
career aspirations
the presidential race (to my dear friends from school, and Sister School, he is a poli sci major, so this is appropriate)
and that's about it...any ideas would be appreciated!

And tomorrow, I am supposed to go to breakfast with one of my friends from High school, DJ Hizway, he is a gospel rapper(is that the correct term??). He also serves as one of my principal spiritual advisers when i can't think of where to find some info. The thing is, when i first met him I hated him...and this was middle school. Then as high school went on, we had classes together and he was friends with one of my fave buds, so he sat by us. Then he got saved and shared his testimony with us, and this cemented our friendship. And we hang out every time he comes down to where I go to school, and whenever I go home(if he's in town). I must admit, he actually inspires me to do better...especially with my HORRID language! I mean he came to visit me and I think every other word was FUCK!!!! even when we were speaking about religious matters! that is when i started trying to curb my cussin'. (Now, please believe, that is still my word...but it doesn't have to be said constantly, right??)

goodnight, or morning?? I must sleep some before going to this breakfast!

enjoy the video below...I thought it was appropriate!

Drivin' Me Wild

2008-08-12T20:53:00.000-07:00

MEME Rules:
1. Put Your itunes/ music player on Shuffle
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER WHAT
After you’ve answered all of the questions, tag 5 other people and then let them know they’ve been tagged to do the meme themselves!

IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY” YOU SAY?
Strange Fruit-Billie Holiday

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Don't Rain On My Parade- Barbra Striesand

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
The Way- Jill Scott

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
The Blessing of Abraham-Donald Lawrence and the Tri-City Singers

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
My Love-Jill Scott

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Misty Blue-Etta James

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Tears Dry on Their Own-Amy Winehouse

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Green Light-Beyonce (I don't even get this one...so, DON"T ASK!)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
Gotta Go Solo-Patti LaBelle /f. Ron Isley (OMG, this is so creepy....but this is so true!!)

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Selfish-Slum Village (IDK about this one, I usually only think about one girl...but I guess maybe it's because of the crushes I have even though I'm involved)

WHAT IS 2+2?
Cherie Amor-Stevie Wonder

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Order My Steps-GMWA Women of Worship

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
For You I Will-Monica

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Respect Yourself-The Staples Singers

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Praise is What I Do-Shekinah Glory Ministries

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Don't Get no Betta- Cassidy /f. Mashonda

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
One Moment in Time-Whitney Houston

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
So Gone-Monica ( I hope not...OMG...this seems to be a bad OMEN if you subscribe to that sorta thing)

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Little Things-India.Arie

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
PYT-Michael Jackson (I hope this is foreshadowing :P)

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Suddenly I See- KT Tunstall

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
I Tried-Anthony Hamilton(This is in keeping with my new attitude...I ain't got time for your drama, i still love you though)

WHAT SHOULD YOU POST THIS AS?
Drivin' Me Wild-Common /f. Lilly Allen

I swear, this is gone be the death of me!

2008-08-11T20:21:00.001-07:00

So the Games of the 29th Olympiad are driving me up the wall already!! I mean, I am never really big on any sports except Track & Field usually...but I am living and dying with all of the American athletes...and I'm serious about dying...I almost died at like 3:00 this morning, watching that swimming relay where the French team said they were gonna smash us...I think not!!! I mean we were in first, then second, then third...and on that fourth leg...MAN, Jason Lezak tore into that French-bitch ass!!!! we snatched that shit right out they mouths!!! That's really His NAME told me about it...right as he was telling me it came on and I swear I wasn't breathing half the time! My eyes teared up from not blinking...it was crazy!!! you really have to watch this stuff(not to is just plain un-American...you can be investigated by the House of Representatives...FYI...don't go through all of that, just watch and cheer! it's the Amurkin way!!) Why did Pink Blossoms will the Black swimmer in the relay to stop breathing so much and speed up...hilarious!!!

In photo: Jason Lezak (who was the last leg and made the actual winning stroke), Cullen Jones(the second African American to have a gold medal in swimming), Garrett Weber-Gail, and (of course) Michael Phelps

So, me and Luncheon Loaf were watching the Olympic trials this summer during our internship, and we still send those random overjoyed text messages to each other. She is a gymnast so she really knows the stuff; I'm an Olympic watcher of gymnastics. And yet, i am sitting here yelping and texting her...and just having a near-nervous breakdown watching these men work their tails off on these apparati(is this a real word??)! BUT I wish these commentators would shut the fuck up writing team USA off! They are there because they can compete...if they were there to lose, they could have stayed home! So, sit back and shut that 'ole in your face (fave line from Titanic [the movie]).

I couldn't find a photo of the men's gym team...I'm still looking though!

why not

2008-08-11T13:01:00.000-07:00

I saw this on on of my fave blogs and decided to see if I could do it too.

10 random things bout me

1. I love Dance Dance Revolution
2. I think I have an addiction to eating...
3. I love reading encyclopedias
4. I really do think I'm one of the smartest folks on earth...really, I DO!!
5. I want to reduce my carbon footprint
6. But I'm too lazy to walk anything over a mile
7. I love politics, but I hate the idea of the American two-party system
8. I hate that people laugh when I'm serious...it happens all the time
9. I stopped practicing my Spanish in reaction to learning that Blacks aren't the majority-minority in the US anymore...I regret that now
10. I care too much, about it all...I need to relax

9 things to win my heart..

1. tell me about myself
2. don't write me off when I tell you about yourself
3. Be a Christian
4. be willing to go randomly into the night, and with reckless abandon
5. make time for me, and keep your plans with me
6. aspire to greatness
7. bear with me, even when I don't comb my hair or shave...there is a method to the madness
8. don't do what you think i will like, do what you want...I like for you to be happy :)
9. live and let live,
10. DONT TRY.

8 things I wanna do before I die...

1. Get published
2. get married
3. raise my children
4. sail the seas, around a reef
5. Travel to the Motherland
6. Change the lives of a few people, for the better
7. become a College/University Administrator
8. get Close(r) to GOD

7 ways to annoy me..

1. question my abilities
2. point out the issue, without offering a solution
3. act as though your sins are less than mine, we all fall short of His glory
4. shoot down a good idea without an alternative
5. go back on your word
6. holding oneself and me to low standards, wasting your potential
7. ignoring the sacrifices made for you to be where you are

6 Things I believe in..

1. GOD
2. the power of the people
3. my ability to change the world
4. doing what's right, even when its hard
5. KARMA
6. eternal life

5 things I'm afraid of..

1. not being good enough
2. being in the rural parts
3. failure
4. meeting my maker
5. being an ineffective leader

4 of my favorite things

1. Minnie
2. food...it's kinda a problem
3. big cities
4. unplanned adventures, they're the best

3 things I do everyday

1. bathing/grooming
2. eat
3. laugh

2 Things I want to do right now

1. See my boo...
2. Go back to school

1 Person I want to see.

1. My great-grandma, and fishing buddy, Alice Marie

Isaac Hayes, 65, has died

2008-08-10T14:40:00.001-07:00

The man who brought the theme song for the hit, Shaft, has passed. He is
reported to have died in Memphis, TN. He was a guest on VH1's I Love the
70s, talking about the music of the period. He was also the Voice of
Chef on the irreverent South Park. He did numerous other things, but I
am not able to share them with you right now.

I know that all this death is making me wonder if I'm as right with the
Man upstairs as I would like to be (forget my desire, as right as I NEED
to be)...
--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

Y'all Bernie Mac done DIED!

2008-08-09T09:29:00.001-07:00

My momma woke me up this morning telling someone died, I became frantic
thinking it was a family member. It was Bernie Mac, one of my kindred
spirits. We shared a philosophy about beating kids. He was also one the
people I model my sense of humor after, I guess this just means its time
for me to step up and join the comedy world! Rest In Peace Mr. Mac!

--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

Hi-fucking-larious!!

2008-08-09T00:17:00.000-07:00

look at this "lost" scene from Dreamgirls....

Also, china basically shit on the whole world with that opening ceremony!!

What on earth is going on?

2008-08-07T20:12:00.001-07:00

So I have been trying to get in touch with but Call me Felicia all damn
summer. Everytime I call it goes straight to voicemail. WTF?? I am kinda
worried about her, I really miss my buddy...do any of you guys know
what's up with her? If you hear from her, tell her I'm thinking about
her.

Update: FALSE Alarm...I just didn't get the text with the new number...b/c I was hab=ving phone issues back when it got changed....so move forward with your life, I am...lol
--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

things are DEFINITELY NOT as they appear!

2008-08-06T00:07:00.000-07:00

Today was crazy, I didn't do anything until around 7, and then it was just to ride out into the rural parts with Meeks. After we finally made it back to the civilized urban jungle, we got lost a little and then when we got un-lost(is that english, real english??) and ran into a hell fo a traffic jam...and then rode completely out fo the way to get me back home...a harrowing experience to say the least.

So, when I got home FINALLY, I had a video chat with Drangry. This fool has started a blog...and it's crazy! We talked about her crazy life, and reminisced about the randomness that is (was) the CBCF 2008 internship.

I guess technically..I should go to bed so I can get started on laundry early this morning...so, I guess this is goodbye?!? NO, I won't say goodbye...I'll say goodnight...

I'm definitely the best friend I know!

2008-08-05T18:09:00.000-07:00

I'm currently in the Burbs on local highways heading to Meeks's school to drop some of her junk off for her move in tomorrow. I just wanna say, rural parts ain't my fave place in the world, and suburbs ain't much better. Why the bffs can't go to school in cities? RURAL places are prime places for LYNCHINGS...am I the only one that knows this? I need to get back to the Safety of the 'hood ASAP! Pray for me please y'all!

Updated 2:54 AM 8/6/2008:So as we leave, i realize that where Meeks's school is not in the rural parts, it is actually a nice little city. But the road there and back was hella rural! and why on earth did we commence to telling stories about ax murderers and the Texas Chainsaw man sitting on the side of the row...and Meeks decides to check the backseat and the trunk...AFTER we have been on the road for 20mins already...we would have already been dead! And I was wondering how I, the most vocal of the scary movie yellers(you know what I mean, yelling at the White girl to get the hell up and steadily saying, "see, that's why Black folks don't get into shit like this...we know where to go...and we know to stay off of back roads at night!") got into this scary movie type shit!!! Praise be to Gawd, we made it back to civilization!!

Not So Lazy Sunday

2008-08-03T10:07:00.000-07:00

Today I decided to go to church with My BFF, it's interesting. I have decided small churches just won't do anymore, I need a church where I can be anonymous, and this church ain't it! As soon as we walked in, folks started acting like me and her are dating...nothing could be further from the truth!

On another note, I have decided (yet, again) to try and lose eome weight. I mean for a while there I wasn't the only fat man in the family. But my cousin died, and all the others are slim or muscular now, so it looks like I have somethings to work out. And these folks don't eat anything special, they just play sports...maybe I'll be able to lose some playing tennis with her this school year, I also need to lift so that I can build muscle to burn fat.

Also, SHE came to Lil' Sis's b-day bbq and made a much better impression on the family, THANK Gawd! It would have been AAAWWWKKK-ward! But things are looking up, except for the fact that I still get nervous around her, what is that?? We started dating in like kindergarten (actually 9th grade, of and on) why am I still nervous around her? I have some issues I have to work out...looks like a conference with LC, Ty-P and Meeks!

OMG, miscommunication is a bitch!!

2008-07-31T18:00:00.000-07:00

So, I was supposed to have date tonight...needless to say I'm now sitting here blogging. UGH, so I call her and askw what time she wanna go...she is at the beauty shop...getting cute for our date TOMORROW!!! I told her I can't go tomorrow...lil' sis's bday party and I'm hosting...and it's an all-day BBQ, so I suggest later on that night...she has to work at 5...so...this is how married life is?? I'm not looking forward to it(I really am, but no this part of it). but I will be able to go out with the BFFs though..so I guess that's some consolation...if these mu'uhfuckahs don't make me kill them first!! I swear sometimes...I am the only sensible person I know! but at any rate....check out the sound clip(click the link) ...it is Vera and Benny going at it over his poor eyesight and her hunger, HILARIOUS!!!

Oh...and I need to pray for Upward Mobility...he's thinkng of turning to ho'ing to make ends meet...I don't think it's that deep...but I guess.

And the Girl with the Open Mind tried to chat with me today via video and voice on Yahoo Messenger...it was a bust..she could hear me, but I couldn't hear her... CRAZINESS.

Untitled

2008-07-30T17:23:00.000-07:00

SO I have been home..I love my people. I wanna go out on a date..but at this point it looks like we won't be able to pull it off before she leaves for school. She leaves the 15th...and the last check won't be sent until the 8th...let's hope it gets here before she leaves....I don'twanna be a sucky Boyfriend!
At any rate...I'm glad to be home..this house is packed...but right now I'm glad to be home. BUT I can feel myself getting sick of these folks real soon, not that i love them any less, I just know how we all are! They want me to do stuff and I don't wanna do it and then we all end up mad. I guess I better check with Malpractice to see when he's heading back..I might need to escape early and stay with him for a couple days! IDK yet...but you will know as soon as I do!
I can't wait for this week to be over. I will be able to hang out with my BFFs...i missed those guys...but the words aren't flowing right now...so I shall leave you with this:

A Negro Love Song
by Paul Laurence Dunbar

Seen my lady home las' night, Jump back, honey, jump back. Hel' huh han' an' sque'z it tight, Jump back, honey, jump back. Hyeahd huh sigh a little sigh, Seen a light gleam f'om huh eye, An' a smile go flittin' by-- Jump back, honey, jump back. Hyeahd de win' blow thoo de pine, Jump back, honey, jump back, Mockin'-bird was singin' fine, Jump back, honey, jump back. An' my hea't was beatin' so, When I reached my lady's do', Dat I couldn't ba' to go-- Jump back, honey, jump back. Put my ahm aroun' huh wais', Jump back, honey, jump back. Raised huh lips an' took a tase, Jump back, honey, jump back. Love me, honey, love me true? Love me well ez I love you? An' she answe'd, "'Cose I do"-- Jump back, honey, jump back.

another day's journey

2008-07-29T01:11:00.000-07:00

So, I am currently on the Megabus heading home from Chicago. Getting to Chicago was HELL! I missed my flight thursday because my bag was too tall and I didn't have money for a fee. So I told them I would have the money on Friday evening, these fools trade me over to the 205 flight, I said that's too early. They said okay you can ttake a later flight; I'm thinking they put me on the later flight, mistaken. So I get there and I'm satanding by and then the flight is delayed so I'm gonna miss my connector. I call Fave cousin nd she finds me an alternate ticket for Saturday morning. I go back to my room yet again. So I decide that I'm not missing this new flight, I go out and we have a ball! I'm really gonna miss these folks! And it's been decided that the Homecoming at my college will serve as reunion headquarters. Finally I get to go home and see my folk, I really missed these ol' crazies! About to sleep. More later.

I didn't think it would be like this...

2008-07-24T12:15:00.000-07:00

So...today is my last day in DC. It's bittersweet: I am so glad to be seeing my fave cousin and eventually the rest of my family; but I am sad to leave behind the new friends I have made. I know that the program wasn't that long but there were great times! Great laughs! When i first got here I didn't even want to hang out with anyone, but I mean I am human, and i need to talk to someone every now and then. I am sitting at work and the office is really slow right now. The other interns aren't in the office, most staffers aren't in either. But I did have a great day! Bosslady took me to this great eating establishment and had a nice chat, I'll miss her...she's the first liberal catholic I have ever met...who actually claims the title! Southern Charm came and talked to me about keeping kosher...I swear she and Bosslady are like walking encyclopedias!! Quiet Strength is in Korea for an exchange program...so I didn't get to say bye to her, :(. Sassy Lady was a life-saver during this program! I mean could you really imagine me without tv for 9 weeks?? I think not! and then she waited for me this morning as I carried my luggage from floor 8 to floor 1!! Jenn: CRAZY as all ge tout..but then again she always was one my favorites!! And Christina...she be on her jo...but she knows how to have a laugh as well. Sam is just a nut!! and Leslie is just the nicest person...I mean I had heard nightmare stories about COSs but she was really cool!! and they were as excited about my bill passing in our mock congress as I was! I am not even gonna start on the friends made outside the office...there are just too many memories...I'll share some later, once I get to Chicago..or maybe back home(I'm not Sure Fave Cousin has the interwebs).

I really hate the endings of things...I think is probably the only conservative thing in my whole persona...why do things end?? but then of course once I'm gone, the ending doesn't seem so bad. I am gonna look back on this and see it as a lesson surely to be learned from!

I'm out for now...we'll see about bloggin in the airport...I'm nto about to pay for internet access...OMG..I have to sit in Hartsfield-Jackson ATL International Airport for two hours...I hope I am able to stay awake...I swear in the last 72 hours..I have had maybe a total of 9 hours of sleep..I can't wait to get on this plane...I'm gonna be knocked out!! and I'll catch everyone up on the goings on of the last week or two...really...this time I'm out!

Come Again...

2008-07-13T19:31:00.000-07:00

So, I went to the cookout, and yes...I got real ignant with that food. I took whole trays of food I took cases of pop (I hate Pepsi, but I took that shit to prove a point). Why the fuck did this inept dude act like he was lookin out for us as wee took food?? talkin about yeah, take it all...I mean y'all know I can't let y'all go hungry. OMG...give me a FUCKING break!! So yesterday felt sort like Thanksgiving...all i did all day was lounge and eat...and I mean I ate...ALL Damn DAY!!! lol oh, yeah...i had some vodka too...which is always fun when its flavored like sour apple!!!

so today...I didn't do a damn thing, I again lounged and ate...it was amazing...but then again...this is why I'm fat now. But I digress...

My buddy decided to cook dinner today...so I still haven't had to use my last two pieces of Tilapia, and that fish is gonna be good!! But enough about food...I do think about other things, even if it doesn't seem like it. Last night I hung out with Precious, Dria da Diva(for a very short time) Wierdo #1, and Angie D: AMAZING!! we watched Soul Food and Terms of Endearment...these movies have such a different meaning from when i first saw them...I really think everyone must see Terms of Endearment...it is a chick flick....but it is necessary! I also had the pleasure to see this movie i watched everyday for a month when i was in like 4th grade, Jack the Bear. This movie was crazy to me when I was younger, btu now that I'm an adult...this shit is even CRAZIER, and I understand why its crazy now!! This movie is about Murphy's law in reality...everything that could go wrong to this family did...from death, kidnapping, unemployment, trauma, revenge...I mean you name it...it happened...but it did work out in the end...it kinda made me wanna go see Radio Flyer. Radio Flyer is about this kid that gets abused, and somehow the older brother doesn't get abused...they decide to turn a wagon into a plane...the younger brother escapes. I looked it up on Wikipedia.org, and I was surprised by the meanings folks got form the movie: some think that the younger brother died at lift-off, or maybe the flight was a metaphor for suicide, or that the step-father beat him to death and his big brother suppressed the memory and changed it so that he wouldn't have to deal with it. Another, even more disturbing thought is that there really was no younger brother, but that the
older" brother created the younger brother to deal with his own abuse...this is some craziness..but it would explain why only the younger brother was abused...I cannot for the life of me understand why I used to watch this movie...it makes me sad to think that kids actually go through that sort of thing. food for thought...

On a lighter note, Malpractice is coming down to DC this weekend...and I'm going to NYC on FRIDAY!!! I can't wait...there will be pics..don't worry!! and I will most certainly be out of it this weekend!

You Can't Be Serious...Right??

2008-07-12T00:52:00.000-07:00

So this was actually a great week for the majority of the thing. I had a great work-week, I mean the bill for CIA got done, I wrote a nice letter, and I got to hang out with the other Black intern for his last week...I mean it was pretty chill. Nothing adventurous happened after work, especially since I don't drink during the work-week. I was, however, able to have some killer dinners: one night I had a frittata with some fried pork chops...AMAZING!!, then i had some damn good spaghetti, I used some really good spinach in it, and then I finally had some tilapia with lemon pepper and some steamed broccoli and some really good mashed taters.

So Tuesday, we have these internship meetings. Why did the program coordinator start to almost cry when he was telling us that he didn't appreciate us "attacking" him in our weekly journals? I don't think he needs to take criticism of the program so personally...but who am i?? So after he finishes his bitch-fit, he tells us that we need to stop pressuring him about getting money. He went on to tell us that when he was an intern, he wouldn't get paid for like three weeks, and they wouldn't say anything about it.

Why did he just pull the most chickenshit move ever?? He left the damn checks in his office, b/c he didn't want to distribute them in front of the donors. I personally don't have any issue with that, but I can't stand that he acted like we were out of line for asking about getting paid. Personally, IDK how I'm gonna eat this weekend, and IDK how I'm gonna get to work, since I used my emergency ride to get back to the school today. but that isn't the worst part, I tried to ask this bitch-ass muthafucka and he had the gall, the nerve, the audacity to run away from me without answering my question. He got paid, because he has direct deposit...so he ain't struggling. So after alll of this...I get back to the dorm, I go to my friend's room b/c the roommate is having a party, why the fuck does this bitch show up...and get this...with t-shirts for a cookout we have to go to tomorrow. He tells everyone that we are getting paid on Monday...I, of course, was not present for this. I will definitely be getting real ignant at this cookout..I'm taking tupperware and everything...i will definitely get real stupid since he wanna act stupid. And if he tries to shoo me away when I approach him about it, I will definitely go above his head...and inform him, and his boss, and her boss that I will not be reporting to work on monday or Tuesday, seeing as I have no food or money to get to work. SO, at this point...FUCK the CBCF!!!

Can you believe this shit?? I can't!!!

2008-07-08T20:56:00.001-07:00

Think I'm gonna start an online thinktank...I'll need contributors. I wanna do it on here, so after I figure out what I need to do exactly to create one..I'll be back..for now, I have to go to bed..I'm so exhausted!!

whatever...I'm out 'til later

BrighterDay, Indeed...

2008-07-08T07:19:00.000-07:00

So I was looking at my financial info the Mommy called and told me, I was distraught because we still owed 2500 dollars. I was trying to figure out how to pay that. But Good news...i don't have to!! I was adding all the info up, and forgot to add in my external scholarship...not only do I not have to pay anything else, i get refund baby!!! I'm not sure how much the refund will be, but it will be something!! Why is all right with the world all of a sudden?? IDK, and I don't care why...because at this point the Lawd has brought me a BRIGHTER DAY! I just had to share that tidbit!! Have a great day, I will!

So why do we love them??

2008-07-04T23:01:00.000-07:00

You know the old saying, "no on can hurt you like the one you love?" I know that is true as of tonight. Let me explain why I'm back up at 2:00 in the morning, even though I went to bed at around 11(I'll explain that later!)

So I'm sleeping soundly, all of a sudden my cell phone rings(Lupe Fiasco's Superstar comes blaring into the room) I jump up b/c I'm thinking its this girl calling because she let me use her Keycard and she needs to get in. But no, it is my lil' sis, and as soon as i answer the phone I'm immediately mad, she is sobbing into the phone about needing to talk to me. I'm so scared that someone in the family has died...I sit up immediately and ask what's going on, she goes on to tell me a story about drunk adults yelling at her and she packing her bags as if to move. She has argued with my uncle's girlfriend and Uncle has told her whatever said girlfriend wants, she gets...and she wants my sis gone...so my sis has to decide if she wants to indure verbal abuse at the hands of someone she isn't related to and someone she loves with all her heart(this being the Uncle)...so she wants me to help her make the decision since they won't give her the night to sleep on it. I immediately say go back home, and she says that they have told her that my grandmother id gonna force her to get a job and buy all of her own essentials(this is a lie, Gram doesn't want her working on anything but getting into her dream college), and that she will be in trouble for leaving on bad terms(again a lie), so i tell her fuck what they said, how does she feel about it right now? and she just starts crying even harder as she explains that she doesn't understand why Uncle hates her all of a sudden, and she goes on to tell me that when they were in Seattle a week or two ago, she was treated like some random tag-along...I immediately hate everyone in that house! And if I could conjure daggers from afar...I'm nto sure anyone but lil sis would still be standing!! so I ask her how she feels about living with Gram and Momma, she said she feels that they would never do anything to her to have her up at all hours of the night calling her brother to cry...and we decide that she has grown patient enough to deal with a woman as particular as Gram, and she decides that she is going home. This really infuriated me...why would two adults double team a teenager who already has tons of pressure on her?? I mean this is a girl who goes to a school where there aren't even complte classroom sets of books, and she takes notes to create her own homework to better herself, she will do anything anyone asks her to do, and she is also one of the most grateful people I know!!! I don't understand it!! I'll be calling tomorrow to make sure she's moved...and at this point FUCK these muthafuckas...they ain't about shit anyway...and I'm glad she's moving back in with Gram!!

Y'all pray for me...at this point I really wish my lil sis could go...

pray for my family if you are the praying type...if not do what ever you do...wish us luck...we need all the help we can get!!

Independence Day(reflections)

2008-07-03T22:02:00.000-07:00

I am up discussing the sad state of affairs today in these United States with Luncheon Loaf-
-The murder of a suspected cop-killer, what ever happened to innocent until proven guilty?
-Folks not being able to afford to actually live in this country unless one is independently wealthy
-The government's screwed up formula for calculatiing the unemployment rate
-My people, my people...I won't even go there today...that is for another, less reflective, more ranting time
-This presidential race...I have realized that Obama being elected POTUS, while great publicity for WA, and even a hope bringer for MA, also makes the job of opening the eyes of the country to the continued, and ever more institutionalized racism will be harder to point out and remedy...and this is not helped by "black Republicans(WHAT are these people anyway?? are they humans in the truest sense??)"
-look how far these Olympic Stars have fallen...it's pretty sad...what the hell??
-Folks being freed after being found innocent after DECADES in prison for crimes they didn't commit(what happened??)

so in spite o fall the negativity...

I, too, sing America.

I am the darker brother.
They send me to eat in the kitchen
When company comes,
But I laugh,
And eat well,
And grow strong.

Tomorrow,
I'll be at the table
When company comes.
Nobody'll dare
Say to me,
"Eat in the kitchen,"
Then.

Besides,
They'll see how beautiful I am
And be ashamed--

I, too, am America.

--Langston Hughes

and don't this just piss you off...

2008-07-03T10:23:00.000-07:00

This is so real...I am so sick of it...watch the video and let me know how you feel about it..lunch break post...gotta love it

I think I'm gonna do that one day...should I??

You right, he don't...

2008-07-02T15:32:00.000-07:00

Today was a great day...after all of the bullshit (MC called me and told me I had lost my scholarship...Yeah, fuckin' RIGHT!!) I got it taken care of though. I proceeded to tell them that they had my GPA listed wrong. They said, oh, sorry wrong person. I can't understand this stuff...why don't we already know this stuff? I mean what kind of crap is this? The deadline to sign up for a payment plan was June 1st, but they are just now working on the financial aid notifications for returning students...I love my school...but I swear there are some incompetent and incapable people running shit there!

I am so glad we only have four-day week this week..I need to rest! I just need to sleep in until like one...and for some reason, I can only do that on weekdays...IDK, I'm weird!!

So, last night I had chicken and waffles, that is for you Girl with the Open Mind! I love this waffle iron...it is AMAZING!! And I have revamped the blogroll...I had to get new reading material..some that actually fit with mine...and peaked my interest. And to Lucky-in-Life: I think I'm addicted now! I think about it all day...and i can't wait to start my Blogroll...lol...

I gave a tour today, it was pretty cool..I liked half the group and I had a great convo with the mom, she's an elementary school teacher from Lee's Summit. We talked about the state of the KCMSD...a sore spot in my life: my lil' sis is still going to school in that wretched excuse for a school district. I won't go there right now, but her passion made me think of one of my BFFs, she's gonna be an Elementary teacher...I'm so proud of her!! I am secretly harboring my own desires to study education policy(SSSHHHH!!! its a secret) I know, my friends and family would tell me to shut up b/c I don't know what I wanna do...but I do know...I just wanna do everything...btu hey, it'll be one hell of a Journey!

So, today BossLady gave me back the bill we drafted for CIA, she was very helpful...now don't get me wrong, she pointed out the flaws...but...she did something we all should think of doing when we point out flaws, she offered solutions and ways to improve the bill. I am pleased with the bill, and I understand the changes she suggested, so we'll revamp it, and we'll rework what needs to be reworked..and it will be indestructible(but not really, we still have a mark-up to go through).

Talked to Feminist Theory yesterday; I was glad to hear her voice. I worry about her sometimes, but then again, I worry about everyone. I am just a ball of paradoxes(is this the right word?): I am ready to go home, bu then again I am so enjoying DC; I am ready for school to start, but I am not looking forward to classes starting; I miss my friends at home and from school, but I know that I will be tired of everyone really fast...I love my job, but i get so spacey(??)...anyway...i'll be back later..onto the blogroll...

BUT FIRST: What do you think of the following quote?
"If we accept and acquiesce in the face of discrimination, we accept the responsibility ourselves and allow those responsible to salve their conscience by believing that they have our acceptance and concurrence. We should, therefore, protest openly everything . . . that smacks of discrimination or slander."
-- Mary McCleod Bethune (1944)

I makes me wanna go out and become a militant, but then again...Big Brother already wiretaps...what would stop them from just silencing me...yes...I said it...I don't trust the government...and I think Kanye was RIGHT...I don't give a damn what anyone else thinks about it...Kanye was right!

The Heart of the Matter

2008-07-01T04:21:00.000-07:00

Well, I've been doing quite a bit of thinking lately...you know trying to figure out what I can do to make sure things are going right in my life. I have been trying to figure out how I'm gonna deal with all of the things I have piled on to my plate, I need to work on planning to use my time more wisely...free time is my worst enemy I've decided. I feel so scatter-brained at times, because so many things are going through my mind at once. I used to worry about everything, but i find this strange sense of detachment to everything, sort of like I'm some spectator in someone else's life. I try to make it matter, but I can't help feeling that none of it matters anymore. I mean, I'm not like depressed, I just keep getting bored...with everything. I mean I really like DC, my office, and the program overall, and yet, I feel this sense of complete, and utter boredom about the daily grind. This is the reason I can't keep an exercise routine, doing the same thing everyday..or even seeing the same place is so UN-inspiring...I just lose the desire to do it anymore. i need to join a group or something, being on a team worked for me in high school. Its something I'll look into.

I've also been thinking about my relationship status: I wonder sometimes, why are we doing this, yet again? but then I talk to her or think about her and my day gets brighter. I'm so lost...I want her, but I sometimes wonder why...is it because I truly love her? is it because she is familiar? I do believe that I truly love her...but could that just be me trying to justify how I've treated her? IDK...I'm trying not to stress about it...but it just got harder not to think about it...she got her official acceptance to Sister School yesterday...I'm excited, and yet...I wonder how things will be when she is finally in the same town as me all the time.

Anyway, I have to tell y'all about this odd dream I had the other night, I answer my phone and it is my mother, she tells me my father has cancer...and its the final stages. I start crying as I try to buy a plane ticket home, I finally get home...I'm guessing I've been crying this whole time, b/c I'm next in the house and it's just Helly-belly lying on the bed crying...so I go pick her up and find Ryphat and Rae-rae, they both look like they haven't stopped crying in several days, there aren't anymore tears left...just dry sobbing...and then my mother wheels my dad out into the room with us...and he just looks so pitiful...he has all kinds of like scars and bruises...and he just doesn't look like the giant I grew up looking up at...I just started crying again...but literally sobbing...and just as he speaks I guess I was starting to cry for real...because I made some sound that woke me up...I stayed up the rest of the day...and I could feel the tears well up as I wrote this...so at this point I gotta go....a brighter note later on...I'm gonna call my dad, and tell him that I was thinking about him...and that I love him...you should too!! :')

India.arie - The Heart Of The Matter lyrics

I got the call today, I didn't wanna hear
But I knew that it would come
An old true friend of ours was talkin' on the phone
She said you found someone
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And all the struggles we went through
How I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside love's open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?

I've been learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning them again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

These times are so uncertain
There's a yearning undefined
And people filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
And the trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
[ The Heart Of The Matter lyrics found on http://www.completealbumlyrics.com ]
And the work they put between us,
You know it doesn't keep us warm

I've been trying to live without you now
But I miss you, baby
The more I know, the less I understand
And all the things I thought I figured out, I have to learn again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my heart is so shattered
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

All the people in your life who've come and gone
They let you down, you know they hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; cause life goes on
You keep carrin' that anger, it'll eat you up inside

I wanna be happily everafter
And my heart is so shattered
But I know it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
Because the flesh will get weak
And the ashes will scatter
So I'm thinkin' about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if you don't love me anymore
Even if you don't love me anymore

Bear with me please, its been a little tough...

2008-06-22T08:27:00.000-07:00

Y'all I don't even know what to say. I been enjoying work, it's been really cool. I really miss my people...even though I am LOVING Dc and the great people I have met! I must say, the Lord has really blessed me with the ability to gravitate toward people that want nothing but the best for me, Angie and Dria really look out for me...and they aren't judgmental, they just help me work thorugh issues and they do have their own opinions, but they never force them on me. They are very understanding and I am so glad to have met them! ;-P

So anyway, I'm supposed to have lunch/dinner with the congressman sometime this week, I'm pretty dang excited about it!! I really and truly like my office and I am so glad that I applied for this...I think everyone should have the opportunity to have an experience like this!! I am gonna have coffee with the Junior Senator from Missouri, Claire McCaskill, on Thursday! I have also seen almost the whole Missouri delegation to the US Congress, how many people can say that?

I am so sick of my whinny, bitchy roommate! I had a little get together last night, I did not invite him (we are not friends, why would I??) so he comes in with a crowd and says something about so i guess I'm not invited? clearly he had a party last week and I had no idea about it, so why would he need to know about mine? Then Dria brings up one of her friends and his tag-along(don't really know either of them, but its cool!) Mr. Bitch decides to whine, complain and slam the door as he leaves, and people keep coming over here uninvited and unsolicited, I don't get it...I don't know of these people...and don't desire their company...WTF? I just really don't like when people act creepy and weird, don't just walk into my room and look crazy...join in or get out, (I prefer the latter, but I'm not a complete asshole!)

Also, the only Full-time Black staffer in the DC office brought me a tv, a remote, and a cable to hook up the cable!! I love my people!! and this is the greatest part: HBO is one of the normal cable channels! I am in heaven now: in DC, TV, good food, good drank, and good people...the only thing missing is a fine lady to call my own!! Imma try to start blogging more regularly again..but i have been really tired lately, I'll do better...not everyday..but more often!

too funny...couldn't resist

2008-06-14T11:26:00.000-07:00

You ain't got a bit o' sense...I swear!

2008-06-14T08:36:00.000-07:00

Okay y'all, my days have begun to run together...and I am so lost at times...Lawd HEP me! So this week was really a work week for the internship, the Congressional Simulation(heretofore known as CIA[Congress in Action])...I had meetings on Wednesday and Thursday...and they wore me out!! I mean I'm already tired from staying up til all hours of the night and day, then I gotta sit around and discuss this inane ish, but I digress. So in Wednesday's meeting we voted to approve the committee appointments...and yours truly was appointed Ranking Member of the Ed & labor Committee, and also to serve on the platform committee(we decide the broad ideas for the party, as a way to guide legislation). So after the vote we addressed some concerns, and all Imma say is DAMN our leader is good!! She managed to get the Speaker of the house to agree to give up one of their seats on a committee to us, thereby eliminating their majority on this committee when they should have had an advantage of two seats, HAHAHAHA! WHOO! so then Thursday, the platform committee met...and I swear to you we were in that meeting for almost four hours!! but we got a dang good platform! I'm pretty dang excited about it. I got paid on Friday, which means I can finally get some dang groceries!!and there will be no more Trader Joe's for me...at least not yet.

So to the title of the post, Dria da Diva is a complete and utter fool!! she can't stand nobody, and she is real confrontational, but in that secretly, sweet way...where you know she is capable of ripping your face off, but she don't seem like she about to...even though she is tearing you a new one!! So, I'm watching a movie with this crazy chick, why the hell did she say, "I'll be right back..."?? This crazy-lady went to bed...and was knocked out! But before that, Weirdo #1 was locked outta her room and they wouldn't let her in, so i decided to do the police knock. This woke the roommate, but it also woke up some drunk ass Whiteboy named Tom...OMG... he starts saying hello, so i just shut the fuck up...why in-THE-HELL did Dria start going back and forth with this fool?? so he comes over and starts high-fiving, telling us all kinds of shit we don't need to know(EX.: I just met up with a girl I haven't seen in forever(Q: AND???), I'm in the coast Guard(Q:And?), Congressman Cummings ripped us(Coast Guard) a new one). I am trying to cut off the Convo, but him and Weirdo one won't shut up, she keep eggin his ass on! So Dria says, "I don't wanna hear dis shit!!" and walks away to go sit down, me and Weirdo #1 are still there listening to his shit...I'm doing it so she won't be alone... but damn!!, SO I look back pleadingly, and Dria, yells, "Hey Robert! I gotta tell ya something!" so then Tom and I part ways; Weirdo # 1 is stuck and she said he tried to follow her into her apartment!! LOL, so she goes to her room and we start School DAZE, about ten minutes in is when Dria goes and does that shady move!! so then me and Precious finished watching School Daze and she finally got the food she ordered, and there was a surprise...an extra cheese-steak sammich!! And do you know, Precious gave it to me!!! So Finally, Angie D got back to the room we talked and laughed and donated to the the Keep A Child Alive Campaign, it felt good. But before we donated we went through\ this thing about why we can't volunteer at certain places, b/c it make sus cry....why did I almost start crying talking about the Soup Kitchen and SHDM?? but then I left and came upstairs around 2AM and why was there a party in my room?? and some of the dudes gonna ask, "Who the Fuck is that nigga??" when I walk into my own room and put my food in my fridge!!! But one of the girls told him, "Shut the fuck up, he lives here..you don't!!" LOL...a mess...so then I stayed up talking to a few of the other folks from the program...they all asked me where I go when I'm not in the room..and you know i hate that shit...so, I say, "I get ghost...that's all that matters..." and they were all like you right, go head!!! And my roommate clowned this one chick...he convinced her that he was going to bed, and he got her thinking he was just overly drunk....faking...and as soon as she left...he saw the elevator close and then grabbed his hoodie and some rubbers and flew across the street, I guess someone had fun since when i woke up at times during the night...his ass was gone!!! lol...so nasty...he just came in and told me that this chick said, "You know?? Almost every chick in this program wanna Fuck you..." HE says, "well do you??" Her: "no, Not me!!" so if she don't wanna fuck, why she make a point of finding him and telling him that?? I was cracking up when he told me that...I couldn't make this shit up if I tried...and I have a very active imagination!!!

And the beat goes on...

2008-06-10T16:02:00.000-07:00

So the second week is here...and y'all...I have made friends!!!! And of course they are women, for this they will be known as Angie K and 'Dria da Diva. So yesterday me, Angie D, and Dri da Diva decided that we would go shopping, they needed groceries and I wanted to tag along. We got off work and went into the Metro Station (notice: we had not heard anything about anything happening on the train system) and we get on this packed train, we rode two stops...and then BAM...we stop dead in our tracks for about 30 mins. We finally moved forward and get off and get on another train to get to the shopping center. We are walking up the street and see another intern, we stop and talk a little. Angie D called ol' boy out for not having any money...me and Dria da Diva died laughing!!! We ended up at Ruby Tuesday, it was cool...my food was good...i can't speak for anyone else's meal. Then we went to a grocery chain and they bought groceries, I of course did no such thing. We then went to Target, and and Angie D went into BedBathandBeyond...she was trying to find pots and pans. She had no such luck...but we did manage to clown the whole time!! after leaving Target, we were walking to the elevator to get to the train station...why did this Mexican man act like he didn't hear us yelling to hold the elevator...it was just as well...cause we needed to get to CVS.

We finally made it to the train stations...why the hell was this train packed with drunk ass...sweaty ass people??? you KNOW I was not in my element!!! and then the dang train was hot as all get out!!! we finally got to the departing station and me being a crazy-ass man...I rushed Dria da Diva through the turnstile thingy...and turned her cart upside down and busted up their eggs. I was so embarrassed!!! I couldn't even stand to look either of them in the face. That was the end of my night...or so I thought...The roommate decided that he wanted to talk to me about his relationship with an unnamed intern...this chick had the nerve to be upset because she wasn't his sole object of affection...fool...this is a summer internship!!! and then he just told me all the shit...I don't even wanna hear it...but then he went on to tell me about everyone that broke up with their significant other for the summer...I don't give a damn about these people. and in the wonderful sentiments of Angie D and Dria da Diva, I just can't take him seriously!!

The Whispers: And the Beat Goes On

And the beat goes on
Just like my love everlasting
And the beat goes on
Still moving strong on and on

Do you ever wonder
That to win, somebody's got to lose
I might as well get over the blues
Just like fishing in the ocean
There'll always be someone new
You did me wrong 'cos I've been through stormy weather.

And the beat goes on
Just like my love everlasting
And the beat goes on you'd better believe it
Still moving strong on and on

Don't stop for nobody
This time I'll keep my feet on solid ground
Now I understand myself when I'm down
Like the sweet sound of hip music
There'll always be something new
To keep the tables turning
Hey this super song
There'll never be an ending

And the beat goes on
Just like my love everlasting
And the beat goes on
Still moving strong on and on (the beat goes on) on, ...

Get down playing that fee, sure the beat is real
The beat goes on

And the beat goes on, ...

Life, Life, Life...Sombody gave me life...

2008-06-06T17:27:00.000-07:00

DC is so wonderful!! I am loving it more and more everyday...except for this high prices...but then again..you know I can adjust as soon as I start making a wage that allows me to live in this area. I am gonna try to go exploring this weekend, since all of the museums are free, there is no reason to just sit in this room all day!! I will, however, be going swimming before I do anything!! And y'all...I was so hurt...I lost my election as Democratic Caucus Chair...I swear these folks don't know what they are doing, the Minority Leader should be loud and outspoken the caucus chair should be quiet and studious, and the Whip should be charismatic and forceful. Our Leader is quiet and demure, she happens to be a member of AKA(weirdly, I like her...), the caucus chair is this very verbose, loud, young man, and the Whip is just what she should be(it doesn't hurt that she's from STL, and attending Howard). So we had elections last night, and then today we elected a Speaker of the House...I did not like any of the choices, and my nominee declined the nomination! so here we have three awful choices...and so I voted for the one that I thought would serve my interests as a Democrat the best, well...I was the only one that voted for her!! two folks abstained, and one voted for my roommate(a stereotypically nasty and slutty Kappa)...I would have voted for him, but he was looking at his shoes and covering his face whenever he had to speak...if he's doing that with us, how in the world can he be the face of our "House??" But I digress; the winner is this boy who never, ever shuts up...I like him and all, but I am in this to act like we are the minority and stop legislation, when its not to our liking. But it should be interesting..I'm trying to weasel my way into the fourth spot on the steering committee...no likely, but I'm trying!!!

I love my office...it is so amzing...and i realized that my congressman actually does do work in DC...i was looking at his schedule for the week...and DANG!!!! I don't see where this man has the time to breathe!!! He is like really in touch with the constituents as well: we draft the response letters, but he personally looks at all of the letters and makes corrections and suggestions...I love that he is involved in the process...and like everyone in my office, except for the congressman(63), the Chief of Staff(55) and the Senior Legislative Assistant(27) are under 25...it is so cool and so laid back...btu believe you me...we work....and we work hard!!! They actually sent us interns on a scavenger hunt around Capitol Hill!!! I swear I walked about 5 miles just trying to figure out where all this crap was at, but ti was fun...and since none of us finished...we all get to have dinner with the congressman...and he pays for it!!!

All in all, this first week was good and exciting...but tiring...I never realized how hard it is to work a full-time job and try to work out and other stuff...But I know now...I really don't see how I managed to work two jobs that summer before Freshman YR, and still go out with the homies...crazy!!! Oh, before I go...I have this new found love of Trader Joe's...but that ish is EXPENSIVE!!!

Just like a birdie
I just wanna fly free
And own a piece of land
Somewhere, somewhere off in the country
Oh, oh yeah, listen

Temperature's like a hundred degrees
Like I got chains on me
Blackmail and a family of three
Been right on my destiny
Rake it out fly way
Cuz it's too much for the man
Shouldn'ta gone down this way
What happened to my master plan
Cuz I can't figure out
I coulda been a love child
Shouldn'ta gone down this way
Tell me, how did I get life?

[1] - Life, life
Life, life
Life, life
Life, life

Oh, somebody done done me wrong (Done me wrong)
My eyes to the ceiling all night long (All night long)
Time is slippin' away from me (Away from me)
And it ain't no tellin' when I get home
I gotta get home, yeah

Just about to see the dollar sign,
thats close to a piece of mind
and everything was about to be fine
So tell me, so how'd I get life?

[Repeat 1]

Everything that I hoped for is gone now
Buried in the ground
Hopes and dreams and all those things
I'll never see, said I'll never see
(Somebody gave me life)

[Repeat 1 until fade]

A throwback I couldn't resist(this counts s the art portion of the last post)

2008-06-01T21:12:00.001-07:00

...

2008-06-01T18:29:00.000-07:00

I had a weekend. I touched base with a few folks I know in DC, I talked to Upawrd Mobility about what's going on in our respective lives. I talked with Gram...she just doesn't understand that I cannot live on $500 for 9 weeks! It takes about $25 oer week to travel between the room and work, and then I have to buy groceries and more than likely, I'll be buying those in the city limits, but I may go to PG County to get stuff that ain't dairy-based, like bread and meat and stiff...the ride is like 45 mins, so that stuff should be fine...it's a little cheaper than in the city. I went to K&G and got 4 shirts and 2 ties, of course it was reasonably priced. I think I'm gonna get a pair of blue slacks, and a navy blazer and then not buy anymore clothes until after summer. and I think Imma buy a tv and then pawn it before I leave, I can't take it anymore!!! I don't see how the Artist does it with no TV..I'm ready to jump...and it shouldn't be that deep!!! (but it is, and that ain't the focus today!!) I have been trying to be social(read: walking across a burning barrier to meet new people), and most of the people I talk to are very nice, but there is this group of rude SC Students...no names...but they are rude!!! I was very much channeling Upward Mobility today, I woke up this morning and did laundry and ironed, I have one shirt left, I'm gonna try to iron it before i go to bed. I talked to Artsy-Fartsy(secretly, I'm jealous that she is in ROME!!) but I'm so happy she is having fun!! I kinda feel bad(-ish) for Animal Lover...she is the only one back home, but I know she'll do fine. I have decided that Imma get another tat when i get home, so when I get back to da 'House, I will be the proud owner of at least one more tat, I might get two more...we'll see. I wanna pump this iron, so I can get my chest tattoo. we'll see my progress at the end of the summer, I will only get it if I have a pectoral and not a boob!!! and the last 2 weeks I've decided to grow my hair back out and get it twisted a few times before I head back to ATL. Imma lock it up this year, since there is nothing holding me back!! I talked to The Otha Motha yesterday, she is gonna be moving this week and she said I can stay with her and Milkman's Daughter(b/c she is definitely White, but it's like she is the long lost cousin that the milkman sired...random, I know)!! I can't wait. y'all...the Dash is out of commission, I have reverted back to the RAZR...and I hate it, but I want an Ipod and a Digital Camera, so I have to prioritize. I'll probably put off a new phone until after I buy books in July/August...until next time...leave a comment and watch the video...I love this song!!

The Lord Has Been Kind...and Soooo Wonderful!!

2008-05-28T14:02:00.000-07:00

Today was crazy y'all!! I got up at the butt crack of dawn and went to the Capitol. We were toured by an intern from the Hon. Eleanor Holmes Norton's office(she is the non-voting delegate from DC), if you haven't seen it you need too!! and all of this stuff is free!! My legs and feet are aching so bad, we were walking for hours!! and I walked more than most other people, I woke up early and thought i was late and went to the Capitol an hour and a half early...so I just had to walk around for the time until the rest of the interns came over.

I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown today y'all, I had no money!! I didn't even have money to pay my fare back to the room from Capitol Hill!! But I called on the family and as usual, they came through BIG TIME!!! They gave me their last just so that i could make it for the rest of the week!! OMG!!! What would I do without these people who love me??? I would definitely perish, or maybe I would just learn to make due without things(I'm gonna go with perishing, but one never knows until one is in the situation). Any way, they put money in my account, which allowed me to continue with the travel associated with the internship orientation!! I, of course, got lost once again trying to get to the lunch from the National Museum of African Art! I went the wrong way on the train and arrived 30 minutes late...y'all...this can't happen again!! and tomorrow it won't; we don't have to be anywhere until 12:00 PM!!! I will sleep until 9!!! YAY!!!

and I did what I have been dying to do ever since the sun began to warm our part of the earth in March: SWIMMMMMMIIIINNNNGGGG!!!!(read with Oprah's Voice) It was wonderful!! and it felt good on my aching legs and feet. But I did realize, i can't swim!! I will re-learn this summer. I found out by jumping into the twelve feet deep end and being terrified!! I scrambled to the surface and clung to the wall until I reached the 5 ft. section...lol but I will be able to jump into the deepest part and not wig out by July 26, 2008. I am also trying to do some kind of exercise daily. Does swimming count as cardio??? I'm going to lift today, after a nice 20 min cardio session!! and then I will finish my work out with another 20 minute cool down cardio session...see Lucky-in-life?? I can take advice too!!! incorporating cardio into my workout!! and I have been doing good!! I haven't been eating the fast food folks have been offering!! I am really trying to be good!! i even wake up and eat breakfast(which I despise, by the time lunch comes, I am beyond ravenous...I feel as though my stomach is eating itself!! and I did it again today y'all, I went and talked with a group of practical strangers!!! i am trying to build some sort of relationship with folks other than my roommate, but I really hate trying to get to know new people, especiall college students...all of these folks are party animals, and that is definitely not me...but, I digress. But I am working to improve myself...I of course cracked folks up today, folks were asking where I was, btu the were asking me...let me explain: I came to DC with a mini afro, I met them with that hair...now I am practically bald!! and they were like oh, did we leave the bo with the fro and the glasses??(I had on contacts) I was like no, I'm here. They all like dang!! Forreal??? I said "Yeah(sounding like Karla), I do it for dramatic effect..." and then everyone just started crackin' up!!

But anyway, read the poem, comment, update your blog, and head on over to going down in flames...I updated it yesterday and am about to do so again before I go work out.

Family

Family is, heaven sent from our father above, bonded by the power of love.
No matter what family has each others back,
when push comes to shove.
Family is, understanding, never demanding, all for one and one for all, I will never leave you alone standing.
Family is, one in itself, my love is your love, your pain is my pain, my wealth is your
wealth, I promise to never leave you by yourself.
Family is, the strongest team, the strongest unit; if love could be visualized, family
would be the blue print.
Family is, forgiveness and patience, it's sweeter than the sweetest fragrance, the
power of family is a reflection of Gods compassion and magnificence.
Family is, never turning our back, and never shames, lend my helping hand and not a finger pointing the blame.
No matter what a family bond can never be broken, even through a nuclear explosion,
if one of us lives we all live. Forever to eternity, we are family, my father, my mother,
my sisters and me.

Antony-Tyrone Smith
AKA
Pen Dragon

In DC, finally!!

2008-05-27T13:52:00.000-07:00

Hey, y'all!! I'm here, in the nation's capital!! And so far I love it!!! I am broke of course, but come Friday, I will not be eating cereal anymore for breakfast and dinner!! They have kindly been giving me lunch!! I was downtown today and it was amazing!! I love how fast the city is...I swear I done sweated (is that a word??) out about 5 lbs in just one day!! But the pace is just fast enough for me!! I love the metro system, it is so comprehensive, and y'all know I like to go and get lost and find my way back. so I've been doing just that!! I had to get up at the butt-crack of dawn and go get a haircut, I made it to the barbershop at around 6:35 AM, I left the dorm at 6:00, the man was ten minutes late, but he did a good job!! I was of course late to the meeting, but it was only because I got lost and went to the wrong location (our morning meeting was different from the luncheon location), but I figured it out and went to the correct place, spending money I ain't got. but anyway, everyone was worried about me and was "so glad" I made it, like I was gonna get murdered...lol ;-D

I am so glad that this day is over, I will not be wearing a suit tomorrow!! I was sweating bullets, plus, I'm wearing it again on Friday, so I want it as clean as possible. I had on those hard bottomed shoes, and I gotta tell you, my dogs is BARKIN'!!!!! I really don't see how those women were doing it all day. I just found out from my roommate that our third is not here because he is just now graduating...wait for it...wait for it...High School!!! and there is this one girl here from Cali, she came even though her school still has classes going on...how random is she?? She is staying up all night writing papers...so glad I go to school in the south!!(gotta find something good, right??) all in all, I'm wondering what the apprehension was about!! I did something that is so out of character for me: I went to a table full of strangers and actually sat with them and laughed and conversed(that was for you Lucky...you know what I was thinking, and it ended in -ating). I can't wait until I have the money to go exploring the city, I found a "Filene's Basement" (Upward Mobility, that was for you, you know my tie collection is about to be off the chain!!)

I also decided that I am not gonna do that thing that I had planned to do...y'all know what I mean...that one thing. I just don't have the time or desire to deal with all the bull that comes along with it! so that lifts a weight off my shoulders. I am gonna try to work out every evening. I think I do enough cardio walking all over this campus, but I do love that the walks don't seem so far!! The only thing I'm not liking is the Humidity and the heat!!! it is too crazy!!!

I don't know what else to say right now, but if I think of something I'll update!! Off to my daily blogroll!!

The Woman at the Washington Zoo
by Randall Jarrell

The saris go by me from the embassies. Cloth from the moon. Cloth from another planet. They look back at the leopard like the leopard. And I. . . . this print of mine, that has kept its color Alive through so many cleanings; this dull null Navy I wear to work, and wear from work, and so To my bed, so to my grave, with no Complaints, no comment: neither from my chief, The Deputy Chief Assistant, nor his chief-- Only I complain. . . . this serviceable Body that no sunlight dyes, no hand suffuses But, dome-shadowed, withering among columns, Wavy beneath fountains--small, far-off, shining In the eyes of animals, these beings trapped As I am trapped but not, themselves, the trap, Aging, but without knowledge of their age, Kept safe here, knowing not of death, for death-- Oh, bars of my own body, open, open! The world goes by my cage and never sees me. And there come not to me, as come to these, The wild beasts, sparrows pecking the llamas' grain, Pigeons settling on the bears' bread, buzzards Tearing the meat the flies have clouded. . . . Vulture, When you come for the white rat that the foxes left, Take off the red helmet of your head, the black Wings that have shadowed me, and step to me as man: The wild brother at whose feet the white wolves fawn, To whose hand of power the great lioness Stalks, purring. . . . You know what I was, You see what I am: change me, change me!

I'm so tired of it...all of it...go ahead take a bow...

2008-05-22T10:16:00.000-07:00

I am so sick of folks thinking they can tell me things at the last minute and it's okay. I do have my own plans, and I enjoy them! I don't just sit around and wait for others to say "Robert! Go do this, and go do that...and so on and so forth," this shit drives me batty!! I was just trying to relax last night, just like everyone else in the house, but no!! I had to fix Gram food(which wasn't an issue, at first), then I had to feed the dogs(again, not an issue at first), and then I had to go pick up Nigel at Uncle's house. The biggest issue was that i couldn't do it on my own schedule, I was reading an article, and had every intention of feeding the dogs right when I finished the two remaining paragraphs...but no, I had to get up and do it right then!!! WHY??? Then I was trying to finish reading the same article, what do i hear as I sit down??? "Robert, go get my dog. I left him at your uncle's house." I say, "OK, I'll go get him," but I continue to try to finish this last two paragraphs!! "Did you hear me??" "Yes, ma'am." "Then, go get my dog!!"

I was so over these folks at this point!!!

And the coordinator of this internship program is pissing me off!! It was unclear about whether or not orientation began on Sunday or Tuesday, so I asked and he told me the program begins Sunday, and it was told to me in my acceptance letter. Obviously, I needed clarification. And then he had the nerve to say, "well, I think you you should get into the habit of checking your e-mail more often during the day. We send out several e-mails per day, and they all have the info you need." I just asked if orientation started on Sunday or Tuesday...why the attitude??

So today I woke up and had an e-mail from him telling me what I was to bring and what to leave at home. I can't believe they think we can bring all this shit on a plane...whose gonna pay for it??? I could barely afford the ticket, let alone any extra baggage and a TV...shithell!!!

But in other news: on Tuesday, I went to the graduation at my alma mater, and met up with my buddy, Cliff. I rode there with Rachel(friend, not sis), and I was able to see my old JROTC teacher, which was nice!!

Yesterday, I went to the graduation of my little cousin, at the Kansas School of the Deaf. It was so odd to be the one that needed the interpreter(the whole program was in sign language and there was an interpreter for us hearing folks...lol, talk about walking in someone's shoes!!

MOnday, Monday...

2008-05-20T12:10:00.000-07:00

Monday was a cool day, I finally went to the park!!! I love the park...it was nice to hang with Helly-Belly, Meeks, LC, and Ty-P!! We just chllaxed for a few hours, then went to Uno's Pizzeria...it was da' bomb!!! It was fun though!! and after that we dropped Helly-Belly back off with Momma...and then went to see "Baby Mama," go see that!! Then I received a phone call from my Buddy Shonda(she lives in NC, and goes A&T, so I never get to see her!!!) and she picked me and our other buddy Rae Etoile up and we went to Sonic(and no I didn't eat!! I've been doing so much better y'all!!!) I just had a shake, but, let me explain, I haven't had any kinda Ice cream cake things in a while. We talked for hours, they wanna come down and see Spel-House Homecoming, but the are really trying to come down for their fall break, I'm starting to get upset at these fall break things...we need one!!! but overall Monday was cool, laid back, and fun!! I'm starting to dread leaving!! Sunday is so close now!! My family is gonna BBQ on Saturday instead of Monday since I won't be in town for any the good family BBQs!!! Don't you just love family?? oh and I'm trying to find a study abroad program for spring 2009...look some stuff up, and let me know y'all!!!

This song isn't how my Monday felt, but this is how most of them are!!

Weekend...major Brain fart

2008-05-19T18:52:00.000-07:00

This weekend was pretty boring, I didn't go to church, and I didn't go out. I stayed home and enjoyed it. Me and Helly-Belly hung out and we ate everything that wasn't nailed down. I read some blogs, and I made Thai Red Curry..kinda weird, but then again kinda good. I befriended a few more folks that will be in DC this summer. I stayed up all night on Saturday and read Harry Potter #7 and watched The Bill Moyers Journal...learned about this family where both parents are former CLinton officials and they are both superdelegates, a Black man and a Latina woman. Of course, they are supporting Obama and Clinton, respectively. I also had a great talk with my uncle's girlfriend and that about sums up my weekend!!!!

Sorry!! Forgot to put up something art Related!!(the Weekenders Theme Song)

Everybody's running and the world it gets so crazy,
When you work so hard there's no time to be lazy,
The weekend comes I'm down with that,
Grab your ball, grab your bat,
Head to the beach, grab some rays,
Better hurry up just got two days,
Playing games,
Hanging out,
Rollercoaster,
Theres no doubt,
Go to the mall,
Lot of fun,
PIZZA RUN!

It's time for all of us to bring it on out,
Hey thats what the weekends all about,
SHOUT!

Best buds, hanging strong,
Best friends can do no wrong,
Just two days, when we roll,
Video games I'll beat your score,
Watch cartoons, on TV,
Drink that frosty chuggafreeze,
That's what we like to do,
C'mon y'all, I'm talkin' to you!

Oh-oh
I'm a livin' for the weekend,
I'm a livin' for the weekend.
HEY!

Is it Friday already??

2008-05-16T21:37:00.000-07:00

I cannot believe its Friday already! I didn't do anything today!!! I talked to Upward Mobility today, and of course he helped work through some of my issues I've had lately with one of the besties!! I also had a photo shoot with Helly-Belly, the photos will be posted below, I ate a Double Cheeseburger, and some Strawberry Ice Cream. I also tried once again to get Marrell to start a blog, I tried the "all the cool kids are doing it" approach, needless to say he rebuffed me immediately!! ;-P I am still slightly depressed about this friggin' "C," and Gram did something unprecedented: she actually applied some pressure on me to decide upon a career...as you can imagine, I was appalled!! Other than that...I restarted the 7th Harry Potter Book, The Deathly Hollows, I just couldn't resist it...so at this point I'm reading 3 books at once...too bad I can't do this with my textbooks...lol...but not really, it's kinda sad!!! I'm feeling a little melancholy, but I hope to get over it tonight...and be good to go tomorrow. OH, two of my cousins graduate on Wednesday...isn't that the trashiest..and they graduate at the same time. This happened when I graduated too, I graduated at one end of the city and my cousin, Lee, graduated at the other end!! How rude...why don't these schools consult us before the file for these graduation dates and times???(asking a lot, right??)

A Friday Gift From Me To You
by Mark Kernan

Here's a little friendship gift, I wish to offer you,
It's words, so carefully chosen, to prove my feelings true.
Of all the beings, in this world, - six billion I believe, or so,
You are the one selected to reap what these words sow.

For every day that I've known you,
Richer I've become.
In thoughts, in deeds, and in visions of things yet to come.
Day and night you're on my mind,
And in my heart as well.
You and I - friends forever - time will surely tell.

The pain you feel, so deep within, is that, I hope to lift,
When today, you, my very special friend, receive this Friday gift.
For all your pain and suffering, God will take you in,
If you just remember, "You're on cloud nine headed for ten".

Thursday, What can I say??

2008-05-16T08:57:00.000-07:00

Okay, so yesterday as most of you know, I went to Barnes and Noble. I found a book on blogs and copied all of the web addresses, they will be posted on here. Some of these blogs look hilarious, look them up and see how you feel. I found this other book about the Black Skin color Complex, I bought it, I had to. I had the craziest encounter with my Sister. She had the nerve to say something about having good hair...y'all know I nearly had a stroke...and I nearly choked her when she went on to defend the notion of straighter hair being good, while nappy hair is bad...this girl really needs some help...so I'm gonna read the book and then get the Gram or Mom to make her read it! here is the opening quote in the book, "This society measures the success of the Negro by how fast he turns White," (James Baldwin). Also Meeks said the darnedest thing: She said that she doesn't care for dark people...and tried to equate that to me not necessarily valuing diversity the way she does...I could not believe this!!!! and she said that our "problems" were of equal lunacy...I beg to differ, how do you feel?? Also, I saw "Forgetting Sarah Marshall," one the funniest movies I've ever seen!! (yes, funnier than "Dan in Real Life" and "Juno"). Okay so I promised two poems and/or lyrics so here goes:

The Revolution Will Be on the Big Screen

My man Gil Scott Heron once said:
The revolution will not be televised
Well...
Gil Scott may have a point
The revolution may not be televised
But...
The revolution will be a major motion picture
The revolution will not be televised
But...
The revolution will be on the big screen

The Revolution will be a fifty million dollar production
The Revolution will be written by John Grisham
And directed by Oliver Stone
The Revolution will star Kevin Costner and Julia Roberts
And they will teach people of color
How to revolt
And how to fight and how to hide and how to kill
And how to SCREAM
The Revolution will be on the big screen, brother.

The Revolution will have one Latino extra
Playin' a thief
One Asian extra
Playin' a servant
And one Native American extra runnin’
down Florence and Normandie yellin’
Geronimo.

The Revolution will have one Black supporting actor
Denzel Washington
Who will be killed by Kevin Costner in the first
three minutes
For looking at Julia Roberts for more than
one minute
While Kevin Costner will have a picture of Whitney Houston
Burnin' in his wallet
The Revolution will be on the big screen, sistah.

The Revolution will be coming soon to a theatre near you
And will get two thumbs up from Siskel and Ebert
And will make more money than Jurassic Park and ET
The Revolution will cost $7.50 to see or $5.50 if
you got a student i.d.
The Revolution will go good with popcorn, bon bons and licorice
The Revolution will be on the big screen.

The Revolution will have a multi platinum soundtrack
Wtih revolutionary songs sung by
Guns 'N' Roses, Metallica and Madonna
The Revolution will be advertised on billboards, buses, t shirts
and at Taco Bell and Micky Dees
The Revolution will be on the big screen.

The Revolution will be distributed internationally
The Revolution will be seen in Cuba, Ruwanda and Haiti
The Revolution will change the way the world thinks about
Revolution
And the way the world thinks about
Change
The Revolution will be on the big screen.

The Revolution will have a sequel
The Revolution will have a part III
The Revolution will be too large for t.v.
Too large for the little screen
The Revolution will be larger than life
Larger than large
And larger than larger than large
The Revolution will not be televised
Will not be televised
Not be televised
Be televised
The Revolution will be
On the Big Screen.

D-Knowledge
(Derrick I.M. Gilbert)

and

Thursday's Child

Mondays child is fair of face,
Tuesdays child is full of grace,
Wednesdays child is full of woe,
Thursdays child has far to go,
Fridays child is loving and giving,
Saturdays child works hard for his living,
And the child that is born on the Sabbath day
Is bonny and blithe, and good and gay.
--Mother Goose Nursery Rhyme

The Arts...How I adore thee!!

2008-05-14T20:26:00.000-07:00

Today was a pretty chill day, I woke up at around 12:00. My Best Friend called me and said get ready, we went to the museum(amazing!!!!) and then I came home and helped Gram in the yard with her plantings. I then called the BFF back and we went to see 21, go see it...it was worth it!!! and we got to hang out with Helly-Belly!!! Gram cooked salmon croquets and creamed peas!!! and just like The Girl with the Open Mind, I had the lady at Chipotle stir my ingredients...simply irresistible!!!! But off to bed people, gotta buy a plane ticket to DC, and help Meeks with her FAFSA!! I also got a friend request from some chick that will be in DC with me this summer, weird...I don't know how she knows...but anyway...goodnight kiddies!!! No poem or song today, getting sleepy, maybe two tomorrow!!!

Home...and all that comes with it...

2008-05-12T21:51:00.000-07:00

So, I arrived back home on Saturday morning, I was completly overjoyued to see the family!!! I slept through my flight completely(a first for me, I normally wake up for the drinks), and was in the airport only long enough to get my luggage, always a plus in my book. I opened a checking account...I really have to work on keeping my spending under control, but anyway, I now have one. I took Minerva "Minnie" McGonagall to Circuit City today, they suspect a virus...which saddens me, its a hundred dollars to to remove the virus because I don't have the extended warranty! Bt I saw Ty-P at Circuit City, and we all knw how I love ot loiter in lots to catch up, s we sat there for about three years(read hour and a half) talking. I have a dental appointment in the morn, I hope it all goes well. Yesterday me and Meeks went to the movies and saw Made of Honor...I decided that I don't wanna be hers...too much drama and too much girly stuff for me...I'll just bake the cake. lol...until later...

Going Home
by Phoebe Moon
You can never go home,
That is what they say.
My response is just a smile,
I know I'll find my way.

Miles and miles to get there,
That is what I might have to do.
But it is all so simple,
My home is inside of you.

Nothing warms my heart,
Than the way you can.
My home, my sanctuary,
Is when you hold my hand.

Hold me in your arms,
until I fall asleep.
Dreams end as I begin to wake up,
You're gone, I'm weak.

Home is where the heart is,
My home is with you.
Since we aren't together,
What am I supposed to do?

I'll find my way back home.

God Has Smiled on Me...

2008-05-08T17:43:00.001-07:00

Today I found out that I I did indeed pass Race and Law!! And Dr. B accepted my numerous excuses and decided to pass me. I took another final, turned in some extra credit and now I am one exam from being a JUNIOR!!! I learned today that I will not be inducted into Ankh Ma'at Wedjau next year!!! If I was a drinker...I'd probably drown these sorrows!! But on the bright side, this is the last night I will spend in the Tenth Circle of Dante's Inferno!!! I cannot wait for this horrid stay to be over. Overall this week has moved weirdly slow, yet swiftly...my finals came up fast, but after I take exams the days seem to drag on...too bad that won't be the case tomorrow, what with packing and everything to do before I get on this Airtran Flight!! I am relieved that it is over! Yet, I have this odd apprehension about what new experiences await me in DC this summer and even at home this summer for the 2 two-week sessions I'll spend there. It feels like I have known Known all of these folks my whole life: Uppity Negro, Lucky-in-Life, Feminist Theory, Chaos-n-Motion, Malpractice, the Artiste, but Call me Felicia, Psych Ward, Upward Mobility and The Girl with the Open Mind. It will be so odd to not be calling y'all to come and visit at the Tenth Circle of Dante's Inferno!! lol...this has been some semester!!! I am looking forward to discussing all the different phases of this crazy, outrageous journey!!!

God Has Smiled On Me

Chorus:
God has smiled on me,
He has set me free.
God has smiled on me,
He's been good to me.

Verse 1:
He is the source of all my joy,
He fills me with His love.
Everything that I need,
He sends it down from above.

Verse 2:
A light unto my path is He,
Without Him I would fall.
I don't know what He is to you,
But to me He's my all and all.

--James Cleveland

Outlandish, to Say the Least!

2008-05-05T13:50:00.000-07:00

Today got off to a really random start. I awoke to the muted sound of my alarm(it was in my pocket), then went back to bed and had a really crazy dream(I'll tell you in person if you need to know), which ended abruptly when maintenance workers from the 10th Circle of Dante's Inferno(BKA Heritage Commons) beat on my door so they could "treat" the mold that I reported in August...I know, ridiculous! I decided it was time to get up and study a little more for this Race and Law final. I did some reading, and then got up got dressed and went to Wheeler hall to do some more light studying. I think that I killed that final for the most part, I hope so anyway! Before I got away from the 10th Circle, Feminist Theory sent me a text message about some horrible blog...I finally checked it about 30 mins ago...I was ashamed of the content...it goes against all I stand for: Why would we want to tear our Black brothers and sisters down?? Anyway...I'm about to finish studying for this History exam...and then go to the grocery store and purchase some vittles!! Read the poem...it explains the horrid blog... but it explains my life this semester!

Outlandish

Bizarre world, weird life
Outlandish people, eccentric minds

We reverie about the future
Live in the present
But still miss the past

We recall the blissful days
Those memorable moments
That we enjoyed a lot
And shed tears

We recollect those silly things
Those awkward situations
When we were nearly in tears
And have a hearty laugh

Isn’t the world bizarre?
Isn’t life weird?
Aren’t the people outlandish?
Isn’t their minds eccentric?

Kavitha Krishnamurthy

Today Was a Good Day...

2008-05-01T19:58:00.000-07:00

Today was the first day of the reading period...which means yeasterday was the last official day of my Sophomore year!! It is all moving so fast, I remember when I got to Morehouse I was just looking for a way to be involved with the William Tucker Society; now, I'm the President-elect, I even got an award at the Awards Ceremony today...totally was not expecting that!!! :-P I had a very nice day, after the elections and awards ceremony, we had a reflections luncheon for the graduating seniors(there weren't any reflections, because they all had exams, lol). When I say it was a good day, I mean it was a good day! The sun was shining, and all was right in the world. I did, however, have a little bout of sadness as I took the photos and cards down from my walls(I got over it and put that mess in a box and taped it up!)

Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine

I need to laugh, and when the sun is out
I've got something I can laugh about
I feel good, in a special way
I'm in love and it's a sunny day

Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine

We take a walk, the sun is shining down
Burns my feet as they touch the ground

Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine

Then we lie beneath a shady tree
I love her and she's loving me
She feels good, she know she's looking fine
I'm so proud to know that she is mine

Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine
Good day sunshine
--Lennon/McCartney

Just Take It Easy, That's the Rule Fool!

2008-04-28T16:41:00.000-07:00

This whole semester has been a harrowing ordeal! I have had to deal with incompetence at the residence, Homesickness, the stress of writing papers of multiple pages all at once. I have not, however, had to deal with drama since adopting this "mind-my-own" mentality, and I thank God daily for giving me the knowledge to know that this was the way to go. but anyway, the homestretch is in sight! I am gonna study hard for these finals and pray for these grades to be acceptable(because at this point, I'm to tired of it to care!!). I am looking forward to Wednesday, April 30, 2008 b/c its the last day of classes...if i was the go out and get stumblin' drunk...that would definitely be the day to do it! lol...anyway...I just finished this wretched Advanced Composition paper...it was the most god-awful paper I have written since that even more awful History of the African American Church Research paper. Now I have to work on getting the WTS registered on campus...because thanks to our useless president...we missed the deadline!! I really hope that I have help when I run the org next year. We will most definitely do things...and I hope someone else steps up to lead the group(but I'd do it again if no one does)!! but anyway...almost home!! I finally found the song from the Doubletree Hotels commercial...it's "relax Max" by Dinah Washington, and i have been trying to take the advice!!!

Relax, Max
Your nerves are just like jumpin' jacks, Max
Your heart is thumpin' with a crazy sound
Hear it pound
Bumpin', bumpin', bumpin'
Jumpin' up and down

Stay cool, fool
Just take it easy
That's the rule, fool
The evenin' hasn't even started yet
So, my pet
Control yourself, control yourself
Don't get upset

Don't think I'm cold if I say you're too bold
I've been fooled by that moon up above
I want your kiss just as you want my kiss
But a kiss is no kiss without love

So relax, Max
I hate to stop you in your tracks, Max
But first you gotta prove your love to me
When you do
I'll love you, love you, love you
Like you want me to

Don't think I'm cold if I say you're too bold
I've been fooled by that moon up above
I want your kiss just as you want my kiss
But a kiss is no kiss without love

So relax, Max
I hate to stop you in your tracks, Max
But first you gotta prove your love to me
When you do
I'll love you, love you, love you
Like you want me to

Ah, come on, relax, Max
Your nerves are kinda bad there, boy
Hold it
Down, boy
Take it easy, fool
Relax yourself
The evening's young yet
Mmm, come on and relax, Max
Relax yourself

-Dinah Washington

The Last Full week as a Sophomore...its ending so fast!!

2008-04-25T18:30:00.000-07:00

I am watching Divine Design on HGTV...on a Friday night(pathetic, I know) currently listening to "Feel Good Inc." by the Gorillaz, a song I fell in love with in High School!!! I can't believe how long I have been out of High school!! I sometimes look at my yearbooks and laugh about the craziness that was my journey through LCPA! I remember the first time I walked into the JROTC room, my cousin Josh had just talked ot me about joining JROTC. I was of course drawn to it by the opportunity to win medals and the shoulder cords(we all know I'm a sucker for pomp and circumstance!). I also remember the first time I skipped school:senior year, was hungry and grabbed two friends and we decided to go to Chili's! We had a blast (except for the fact that my car was dying, I had to press the gas and the brake at the same time to keep it form shutting off at a light!!)! I also remember all of those dances: JROTC Ball (went four times, and each year hoped that my name would be listed on the program[Senior year it was :)]), JR YR Prom, and of course Senior Prom!! I really learned to enjoy myself at those balls, they really gave me a chance to be a different version of myself: a more outgoing, personable Bobby_2010, and secretly I loved every minute of it. I am trying to make that version of Bobby_2010 the permanent version! I have actually worked on becoming more outgoing, b/c I am a great person and I have no reason to have this aversion to people. I am trying to allow myself to be more open to people, I have realized that the mask I created to keep from being hurt by kids that wanted to tease me for being the fat kid has ceased being a mask and has become my true public face. I realized that there are people that will hurt me, but there are so many more people that would help me and support me. I have also learned that to be hurt is to be human, and human is all that I need to be! As Girl with the open mind would say, if God be for me WHO can be against me?? I'm learning to let go and let God!

We Wear the Mask

We wear the mask that grins and lies,
It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,—
This debt we pay to human guile;
With torn and bleeding hearts we smile,
And mouth with myriad subtleties.

Why should the world be over-wise,
In counting all our tears and sighs?
Nay, let them only see us, while
We wear the mask.

We smile, but, O great Christ, our cries
To thee from tortured souls arise.
We sing, but oh the clay is vile
Beneath our feet, and long the mile;
But let the world dream otherwise,
We wear the mask!

--Paul Laurence Dunbar

The Great Unknown...or is it...

2008-04-24T09:26:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a day! My adviser didn't come to class, so I worked on perfecting my presentation for Race and Law...I received an "A" so I was pretty happy about that. After that I surfed Facebook for the rest of the day, I looked up for a little bit During Advanced Comp. to realize I have classes wiht some really silly people, this photographer took tons of pictures of her kids, and one shows her older daughter with brown lines all over her, and she doesn't have a shirt on(the girl is about four) and some idiot in the class yelled out, "OMG! Who took a picture of a little girl that just got molested by her daddy?" Can you beilieve that?? the title of the exhibition is Immediate Family, what mother would take pictures of her daughter and the father that molested her?? Sometimes I feel like I'm in the cradle of idiocy!!

But the day got better, I didn't have any stress after classes! I love White Castle, but being that I'm in GA...there aren't any, but there is KRYSTAL(a not so good cousin of White Castle) and Marrell was willing to take me to get a few sliders! They hit the spot! After that, Flyy on the wall, the Artist and Uppity Negro came over and we had a sort of study party. During the study party I finally registered for classes....on Fridays I only have class at 11 AM!!!! I'm so happy!! and I have pretty nice breaks between my Classes!!! Of course, Chaos-n-Motion has been wanting to take classes with us, so Uppity Negro called him and told hiim about our Econ and Religion classes, both of which are MW classes in the evening. Chaos-n-Motion tried to get us to change the classes to morning because he doesn't do evening classes...I personally wasn't havin it! Then he asked to speak to me, and said, "so, you are taking evening classes...what about organizational meetings??" Who cares...I'm not about to mess up a great schedule to cater to some organization! and the one that I'm the leader of will have meetings when I don't have classes!!

After the friends left, I went to my room and tried to sleep. Needless to say, sleep didn't come easy. I got up and put on some shoes and went outside into the cool night and tried to see the stars. A passerby asked me what I was looking for...I couldn't really articulate it...but I think my eyes were watching God...there was something there in the darkness that kept my attention and I couldn't really(didn't really want to) tear myself away right away.

"They seemed to be staring at the dark, but their eyes were watching God"- Zora Neale Hurston

Reflections...

2008-04-22T16:51:00.000-07:00

Hello WORLD!!! Today I talked with Momma, I love talking to that Crazy lady!! We of course talked about politics, my fav topic!! Anyway we were just talking about abortion and I realized that of all the people I know, Momma has the political ideals that are the most in line with my own. I think the only thing we disagree on is gay marriage, but that's because I'm an ultra liberal and she is just liberal. We have talked about legalizing prostitution, marijuana, and the use of school vouchers. I say legalize them both and regulate them, I really think that we need to allow things to come into the light to keep people healthy. I disagree completely with school vouchers because they take money away from public schools(read cash-strapped, struggling) and giving it to families to subsidized private schooling(both parochial and secular). I just don't understand the logic behind this: take money from the poor schools and give it to parents to put their children into private schools for better education, instead of improving the schools tax payers pay for?? also, what about families that still wouldn't be able to afford tuition if it was subsidized?? So, they have to pay for someone else's child to go to a school they can't take advantage of?? STUPID!!!

But I digress....

I'm ready for it!!!

2008-04-22T08:08:00.001-07:00

Create Fake Magazine Covers with your own picture at MagMyPic.com

The Road to Manhood...the Road to becoming Me..

2008-04-22T07:18:00.000-07:00

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth.

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same.

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
--Robert Frost

As a child, I heard this poem so many times and never once grew tired of it. I never remembered the author, or even the words, but something about it spoke to me. Maybe it's because I was able to see that this poem was speaking about my future. You see, I was raised by a wonderful Grandmother(Gram), who always taught me to be proud to be Black, she never allowed me to speak of Black people in tones that did not do us justice(Black people were always we, or us--never "them, or they"). She helped me to see the beauty that comes from being Black, she helped me to see the greatness that can be achieved, even when no one outside your home wants, or expects, you to make anything of yourself! And for this I am Grateful!! I thank God for my Family: Gram, Momma, Daddy, Ry-fat, Chella, Uncle, Aunt Leona, Teeta-bom, Ketia, and LeLe...now this is not to diminish the importance of the rest of my family...but these are the people that I have had almost daily contact with throughout my life. I will speak about other members of my family as we progress. BUT these are the people that I think about on a daily basis...and long to see when I am away for too long! These are the people that influenced me to take the road not taken...the road less traveled by...