Is This the End of It Already?

I recently told you guys about the troubles I'm having with my education. Well, Today I was informed that i did indeed have my scholarship revoked. I am not sure why it took so long for them to inform me of this decision. I mean, the semester ended about a month ago, and now it's a week before school there starts(Wednesday), and a few days before classes start at the potential school(Monday). The man that informed me told me I have until Friday to send in my appeal, I sent one in in December, but I guess they can't be bothered to retrieve the appeal I sent in previously...I guess I'll go send it in again right now.

I am so upset about this because I will not be able to continue my education as an African American Studies Major, and I also will have to tack on at least another semester to my undergrad career because most of my credits won't transfer to my new school as I will now be a History major Pre-MAE...and I haven't really concentrated in history at my current/former school. I am sad to say this, but I feel an odd sense of relief now that I have at least gotten an answer, but then again I'm slightly depressed att he same time...but it's really about having to change things prematurely...btu it must be noted...I DID NOT get kicked out of school, I am still in good standing, I just can't afford to get this education at this school that costs 34000 dollars per year...I mean I can't even get the loans to cover it.

I told some of my friends at school, but Chaos-in-Motion wore me out. I told him and he said that I can't leave because he doesn't want things to change. I thinks it's crazy how he can only see how this thing affects him. He said it's only money, and that this thing is bigger than money. He also said it's about more than education...but not for 34000 dollars per year. at this pint, it's all about making it to law school...fuck everything else...I love my friends, but I gotta go and do what I gotta do. I had a fun 2.5 yrs there, but there are bigger fish to fry(LSAT, LAW SCHOOL, and eventually this PhD). Pray for me...as I move down this new path in the wilderness.

This is what it's all about the the road to manhood, the road less traveled!

Did I Miss Something...a Memo Maybe?

I just do not understand why people think it's okay to question my faith. I mean, I expect it from some people, like my married friend, my grandmother, and my uncle that is a deacon. But from my BFF? I mean, I expected that even if you didn't agree with my views, you would still respect ME enough to discuss them without making charges that I'm lukewarm in my beliefs. I mean, I try to base my beliefs off what I read in the Bible, with my own eyes. I am also an American, so I truly believe in a separation of church and state. i believe that our Constitution was meant to protect the minority from the whims of the majority. I do NOT see any issue with this. I feel that as a Christian, fighting for HUMAN RIGHTS is a major part of why I am here. I also believe that the government should not be allowing the whims of "religious" hate mongers to prevent certain groups from participating in CIVIL ceremonies. I would never try to force a church to perform a gay wedding, I would never force a racist to perform an interracial wedding, but I DO expect officials to uphold the US Constitution and allow persons to exercise their UNALIENABLE rights, despite how I, or anyone feels about it. I feel that I am following in the footsteps of Christ when I stand up for those that are abused by members of our society that happen to be in the mainstream. Jesus hung out with the hated tax collectors, and at least one unclean woman.

I do not see why there is an issue with my questioning the things that do not make sense to me. But I guess because I try to get other perspectives on my questions some folks take it as the only reason I read is so that I can have more ammo to go against the "FAITH." it's not like that, I mean I read the Bible and there are some things that are at perfect peace with my heart, and there are others that are not. I feel that since I have been created with this mind, I can question things until they are explained in a satisfactory way. I'm so over it...this whole "religion" thing...I just wanna do me...why can't other folks just let me alone??

I'm sorry to ramble, but I had to put this out here so I could see it and get my words together before I attempt to go and make nice with my BFF...

Happy Honda (or Holi-, if you aren't in the market for a car) Days!

Had a blast with the buds! Just like high-school times, we were all sober the whole time! And folks(read: Ms. (im)Perfection) think i can't have fun without alcohol! Here's hoping the New Year brings less drama, and head-/heartache!!!

And this is to you, Blagojevich, Burris, and Rush

Random Funnies...lmao

Quotes:

"Ripley's Bitch. Believe it or not." read in the comments of this post

"Bitch! We in da Bayou!" Crazy ass friend

"Don't inTERupt...RUUDE!" Bon Qui Qui (hint: it's the first video below)

Videos:

Path to the Future

So I went shopping for some jeans yesterday, I was so appalled! I have gained so much weight! I need to make some changes seriously...I'm working on developing a plan to get back to at least the weight I was in high school. I'm so out of shape. I need to get back into the gym...I might have to take Chaos-n-Motion up on his idea to join this gym back in the school town.

Also, I'm thinking I'm gonna buy a tennis racket and play with Ms. (im)Perfection, that way we can work out together. We also decided that we are gonna stop our late night runs to Checker's, but we're still gonna go to Ru San's and eat sushi...that shit is good. lol

Bitch, We in da Bayou!!

So I have been going through! I am in jeopardy of losing my scholarship, and having to transfer to the local university. This is disheartening because I will basically be starting over, this potential school doesn't offer a major or a minor in African American Studies...which is what I'm majoring in now. Also, I will be living at home...so there will be no more partying, no friends, and no girlfriend(since she just transferred to my current school's sister school next door). I am so hurt by this because this is the semester I worked my hardest since coming to college, and to suffer such a set-back is beyond depressing. I don't have money, and I don't know if I'll be continuing my education the way I planned...life could be so much worse, I'm sure, but it feels really shitty right about now.

On another note: My family is so FOS...So I've been spending time with my one of my BFFs...and both of them are girls. My family tries to make me feel guilty about the amount of time I spend with them. They have brought it up before...and I've spoken to Ms. (im)Perfection about it...she said that she is fine with the amount of time I spend with them...especially because I see her at school now and only see them for a week or two every few months. I have even gone so far as to make sure I am home by 10 PM every time I go out with the BFFs...this is even when Ms. (im)Perfection is at work and unavailable to hang out with me...IDK, is it excessive to spend almost all day with my female best friends when my girl is at work? I think of them as like my similarly aged siblings, and I am only interested in making things work with Ms. (im)Perfection right now...