Aaaahhhh the Memories...

Yesterday was awesome! We (Lucky-in-life, Upward Mobility, and Psych Ward, and I) were sitting in my dorm room just talking and some how, we started to reminisce about the joys of being a child

-like when you watched Face on Nick, Jr.
- Leon on the Puzzle Place, why give the black guy such a black-sounding name?? I loved it though!
-Alegra's Window, Gullah Gullah Island, Eureka's Castle, Barney, C-bear and Jamal, and countless others
-Geography
-Becoming the geniuses we are now, better let your (future) children read encyclopedias, then they might one day get our level...lol
-Those WONDERFUL books from childhood: Corduroy, Peter Rabbit,Where the Wild Things Are, and countless others
-My favorite books from childhood were often in Spanish, since I went to Spanish Magnets for most of my elementary education, but here's some of the English ones: Cloudy with a chance of Meatballs, Kat Kong, Dogzilla, Ralph S. Mouse: The Mouse and the Motorcycle...and especially Romona Quimby, Age 8
-Then laughing at the drama that seemed so large in high school, and now it makes you laugh because those would be great problems to have right now!
-reflecting on how it is still asking a lot to have to write a paper over a page...5 pages is still a daunting task...and I'm trying to go to law school...I need to get over this!!
-It's also so weird that after this year...I won't know anyone at my old schools...isn't that crazy?? I have known folks the graduating class of 2000...now I won't know any AT ALL...WILD!!!

(Contented sigh) to Be able to go back for just a day with this knowledge intact...how odd things would be!

Bitch, We in da Bayou!!

So I have been going through! I am in jeopardy of losing my scholarship, and having to transfer to the local university. This is disheartening because I will basically be starting over, this potential school doesn't offer a major or a minor in African American Studies...which is what I'm majoring in now. Also, I will be living at home...so there will be no more partying, no friends, and no girlfriend(since she just transferred to my current school's sister school next door). I am so hurt by this because this is the semester I worked my hardest since coming to college, and to suffer such a set-back is beyond depressing. I don't have money, and I don't know if I'll be continuing my education the way I planned...life could be so much worse, I'm sure, but it feels really shitty right about now.

On another note: My family is so FOS...So I've been spending time with my one of my BFFs...and both of them are girls. My family tries to make me feel guilty about the amount of time I spend with them. They have brought it up before...and I've spoken to Ms. (im)Perfection about it...she said that she is fine with the amount of time I spend with them...especially because I see her at school now and only see them for a week or two every few months. I have even gone so far as to make sure I am home by 10 PM every time I go out with the BFFs...this is even when Ms. (im)Perfection is at work and unavailable to hang out with me...IDK, is it excessive to spend almost all day with my female best friends when my girl is at work? I think of them as like my similarly aged siblings, and I am only interested in making things work with Ms. (im)Perfection right now...

WHY is this my life?

I am swamped with school, I just thought of a topic for my paper that is due on thursday(after weeks spent looking through sources), I am so BROKE...but Friday is pay day. and this is the final full week fo school, so I have a couple of weeks to get my life together and eeek out an acceptable GPA!

In other HORRID news, I failed a course required for my major, I withdrew, so it's no problem of bringing down my GPA but, and here's the kicker, I have to take 15 hours each semester to keep my scholarship...I'm only taking 12 hours now...but if i had stayed in the class and failed I would've been in worse condition...so WHAT am I TO DO?? Can't really stress about it now.

Also, I think I may be in trouble as far as grades go anyway, because of my spotty attendance! I REALLY HATE GOING TO THIS TINY SCHOOL at times! why do we have to have attendance policies? if I don't feel like going to class that should be my prerogative!

but other than that, life is great! lol, I can't even take myself seriously saying this....since this is my life...and it's SCREWED up...my life is, in essence, screwed up! HELP ME!!!

Sometimes

This is inspired by a post I saw on The Baby Daddy Diaries.

Sometimes...I feel like a nut.
Sometimes...I don't.
Sometimes...I just wanna quit.
Sometimes...I wanna cry.
Sometimes...it's too hard.
Sometimes...I just have to laugh at it.
Sometimes...I wonder why.
Sometimes...I don't feel like answering the phone.
Sometimes...I just don't care.
Sometimes...I get sick of everyone.
Sometimes...I get sick of everything.
Sometimes...I want to be alone.
Sometimes...I'm overjoyed!
Sometimes...I need you around.
Sometimes...I feel undeserving of the blessings.
Sometimes...I just need to be myself.
Sometimes...I need to realize my own limits.
Sometimes...I care entirely too much.
Sometimes...I long for the days when I was carefree.
Sometimes...I smile for no (apparent) reason.
Sometimes...I need help.
Sometimes...I want to give up and go home.
Sometimes...I feel like a failure.
Sometimes...I feel so LOST!
Sometimes...i pray it through.
Sometimes...I feel so confused.
Sometimes...I feel like me...a blogger called Bobby_2010...

Whew!! Glad the wait is over!!

Y'ALL!!! I have been going through! Being broke is no joke, but it is made all the worse when you are owed money by someone who has it and refuses to give it to you! Well, that was my life dealing with this freakin' school, waiting on this refund!! It was a saga! I was promised it Thursday, then I gave them until Friday evening...and was on edge all of Saturday, and Sunday....OH, Sun-DAYEEEE...I was ready to head to the top of the parking deck and JUMP!!! I really was so over life at that point! But that has all changed, I FINALLY got my DAMN money today! and in the words of the notorious The Artist, "Imma poarty, and Imma eat!" Seriously...with Homecoming around the corner..I need Shoes, a new suit, and I have pay for tickets to all of the shit and I also have to buy plane tickets and play tickets(I'm going to see WICKED!!!)and a whole bunch of other shit...but I clearly have shit to do...so I bid you, o blogosphere, adieu!

So life has soem great, funny moments...

and they are best when shared with friends! As I sit here "studying" (by which I mean, watching tv and surfing the net), I =keep seeing this Target commercial and I love the song they played in it, it's called More Where That Came From by Dolly Parton...and it is hilarious. I have posted the video below!

The week from hell!!!

SO this was definitely not my week! I lost 100 dollars that I don't have and now need, I didn't even get the letter of recommendation for this organization I want to join, I didn't get a workstudy job, and to top it all off...My FUCKING Refund is still not here yet!! So what the FUCK am I to do?? I swear, things felt like they couldn't get worse, but, alas they did: my phone is technically out of service, but I can still get incoming communiques.

I am hating all of this drama! I just wanna go to class, eat some good food, watch some nice tv, and chillax on the weekends. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?? I am so over this place...this city sucks, and my school sucks ass most of the time!

I am about ready to fire these suckas on my e-board for the Af-Am Studies Club: this Tuesday will be our fourth "FIRST" general Body meeting...WTF?? I mean I have an e-board so that everything doesn't fall on one person! I mean I made the fliers, why the fuck can't you print them and post them, without me micro-managing shit?? I mean I told the VP to call an e-board meeting, this fool completely ignored me and I had to call it...if I'm doing it all, I'll do it all and get rid of the dead weight! The Treasurer is not doing shit that I ask him to, I need to put together a damn budget so that I can go get appropriations and this fool will not go meet with our adviser to figure out the shit to put on the paper...Just go sit down and write!! and then give the shit to the VP, and please go and get a damn Treasurer's report form the damn business office...not the same one that I gave you from MAY!!!

This rant is over...I am so worn out by this shit...and I'm about over it...if too much else goes wrong...I'm gonna need to go on the watch!!

Where the Chilly Winds Don't Blow

I am so nervous, I am so scared, I am crushed, put me on the watch!! (you know damn well, which watch I'm talkin about!!) I just got the blow of my collegiate career...and it is really hurting me. I'll talk about it more in a few months, b/c there is still time to work it out! I just have to work harder, and hopefully all will be well! But it really hurts right now! But I have to go to class, so I'll sulk another time! Time to get back on the grind!!!

Title taken from: Chilly Winds Don't Blow by Nina Simone

It's the Small Things That Make Life Great

Last night about 11:45 me, Ms. (im)Perfection, Psych Ward, and Upward Mobility decided to go to get some of the best pizza I have ever had, from this local place. I mean the pizza was great, but the convo was wonderful!! I wish I could remember what it was about, but since we talk in circles and randomly select topics, I won't even hurt my self trying. I will say that I have the best folks on earth surrounding me! We have all changed so much, and I have learned that first impressions are usually misleading. because I definitely started off hating Psych Ward and Upward Mobility, and now they are some of my favorite people on earth!

I really wish that I hadn't wasted most of yesterday, I have a ton of work to do this weekend, a ton of reading, and I still need to do some laundry. I am such a SLACKER!!!!! I guess, I'll write more when i can clear my mind and put together real sentences.

O, BTW...Malpractice's Ex-gf, is a true bitch...her status was raw on Facebook: I laughed but then I thought about the fact that it was my boy, who had done everything he could to help her in her sick, twisted, and dimented life. And this chick has the nerve to write this:(insert name) hopes it's not dysfunctional this go round lmao I finally found someone who knows what the hell he's doing :-).
THEN she wrote this: let me stop lmao.

and THEN this: deon was right, a true man (....boy, really) could not do someone as dirty as he did. I can't be mad at no one but myself abd learn.

Now she says he did her wrong...he bought her a phone, let her move in with him, and then let her stay once they broke up...and then she talks all kinds of shit this summer, and now b/c he refuses to put up with her shit and has moved to another (real) woman she is acting funny...where do these crazy folks come from??

I think I might have...

Seriously...I think that I some form of dementia. I mean, why else would i forget almost everything? The short-term memory is just about non-existent! I got on here to write about something I was thinking about earlier, and only five minutes elapsed between the thought and the signing into Blogger. I hate this...and I'm READY TO GO!!! I have so many great folks to hang out with!!

It's not so bad...

So, I'm basically alone in my hometown. I mean I have my family, but SHE is gone, as are all of my friends except for like one or two...and they are leaving in the next few days...so I have a whole WEEK left at home and nothing to do except go to breakfast with one of my high school classmates.

So I'm trying not to be upset that SHE is gone, because I mean she's going to the same place that I'll be in next Saturday, but HELL I wish she could've just left when I left! I guess she didn't really have a choice since she transfered to the Sister School and has to go to orientation. But I mean things are gonna get a lot better once I get down there, then we will not have all of the distractions and intruders that we have at home. Also, from now on SHE will be known as Ms. (im)Perfection. This is because her imperfections and eccentricities are what make us so compatible, and also kinda volatile. I helped her pack her truck today so she can drive down in the morning...well I guess to drive down in a few ours...I wish I could go with her, but my dorm does NOT open until the 24th...so I have nowhere to stay...and her momma ain't having that Bobby_2010 stay in the same hotel room thing. Also, her grandma, who loves me, threatened to come down to where we go to school and shoot up the entire city if I don't take care of Ms. (im)Perfection! And the crazy thing is, I kinda believe her! (Shivers, and teeth chatter)

Back to this friend that will still be here after all the others leave. He goes t the local university, and we met in 8th grade. Now I truly consider(ed?) him a friend, but this will be the first time I have ever hung out with him outside of a school function, a HIGH school function...I graduated three years ago. I mean...WTF is that about?? Anyway, I guess we are rectifying this...but it seems odd to me.I can't even imagine what the convo will be about as we eat breakfast...but I'm trying to come up with talking points, here are a few

• college life so far
• activities this summer
• career aspirations
  
• the presidential race (to my dear friends from school, and Sister School, he is a poli sci major, so this is appropriate)
• and that's about it...any ideas would be appreciated!

And tomorrow, I am supposed to go to breakfast with one of my friends from High school, DJ Hizway, he is a gospel rapper(is that the correct term??). He also serves as one of my principal spiritual advisers when i can't think of where to find some info. The thing is, when i first met him I hated him...and this was middle school. Then as high school went on, we had classes together and he was friends with one of my fave buds, so he sat by us. Then he got saved and shared his testimony with us, and this cemented our friendship. And we hang out every time he comes down to where I go to school, and whenever I go home(if he's in town). I must admit, he actually inspires me to do better...especially with my HORRID language! I mean he came to visit me and I think every other word was FUCK!!!! even when we were speaking about religious matters! that is when i started trying to curb my cussin'. (Now, please believe, that is still my word...but it doesn't have to be said constantly, right??)

goodnight, or morning?? I must sleep some before going to this breakfast!

enjoy the video below...I thought it was appropriate!

I'm definitely the best friend I know!

I'm currently in the Burbs on local highways heading to Meeks's school to drop some of her junk off for her move in tomorrow. I just wanna say, rural parts ain't my fave place in the world, and suburbs ain't much better. Why the bffs can't go to school in cities? RURAL places are prime places for LYNCHINGS...am I the only one that knows this? I need to get back to the Safety of the 'hood ASAP! Pray for me please y'all!


Updated 2:54 AM 8/6/2008:So as we leave, i realize that where Meeks's school is not in the rural parts, it is actually a nice little city. But the road there and back was hella rural! and why on earth did we commence to telling stories about ax murderers and the Texas Chainsaw man sitting on the side of the row...and Meeks decides to check the backseat and the trunk...AFTER we have been on the road for 20mins already...we would have already been dead! And I was wondering how I, the most vocal of the scary movie yellers(you know what I mean, yelling at the White girl to get the hell up and steadily saying, "see, that's why Black folks don't get into shit like this...we know where to go...and we know to stay off of back roads at night!") got into this scary movie type shit!!! Praise be to Gawd, we made it back to civilization!!

BrighterDay, Indeed...

So I was looking at my financial info the Mommy called and told me, I was distraught because we still owed 2500 dollars. I was trying to figure out how to pay that. But Good news...i don't have to!! I was adding all the info up, and forgot to add in my external scholarship...not only do I not have to pay anything else, i get refund baby!!! I'm not sure how much the refund will be, but it will be something!! Why is all right with the world all of a sudden?? IDK, and I don't care why...because at this point the Lawd has brought me a BRIGHTER DAY! I just had to share that tidbit!! Have a great day, I will!