Aaaahhhh the Memories...

Yesterday was awesome! We (Lucky-in-life, Upward Mobility, and Psych Ward, and I) were sitting in my dorm room just talking and some how, we started to reminisce about the joys of being a child

-like when you watched Face on Nick, Jr.
- Leon on the Puzzle Place, why give the black guy such a black-sounding name?? I loved it though!
-Alegra's Window, Gullah Gullah Island, Eureka's Castle, Barney, C-bear and Jamal, and countless others
-Geography
-Becoming the geniuses we are now, better let your (future) children read encyclopedias, then they might one day get our level...lol
-Those WONDERFUL books from childhood: Corduroy, Peter Rabbit,Where the Wild Things Are, and countless others
-My favorite books from childhood were often in Spanish, since I went to Spanish Magnets for most of my elementary education, but here's some of the English ones: Cloudy with a chance of Meatballs, Kat Kong, Dogzilla, Ralph S. Mouse: The Mouse and the Motorcycle...and especially Romona Quimby, Age 8
-Then laughing at the drama that seemed so large in high school, and now it makes you laugh because those would be great problems to have right now!
-reflecting on how it is still asking a lot to have to write a paper over a page...5 pages is still a daunting task...and I'm trying to go to law school...I need to get over this!!
-It's also so weird that after this year...I won't know anyone at my old schools...isn't that crazy?? I have known folks the graduating class of 2000...now I won't know any AT ALL...WILD!!!

(Contented sigh) to Be able to go back for just a day with this knowledge intact...how odd things would be!

Did I Miss Something...a Memo Maybe?

I just do not understand why people think it's okay to question my faith. I mean, I expect it from some people, like my married friend, my grandmother, and my uncle that is a deacon. But from my BFF? I mean, I expected that even if you didn't agree with my views, you would still respect ME enough to discuss them without making charges that I'm lukewarm in my beliefs. I mean, I try to base my beliefs off what I read in the Bible, with my own eyes. I am also an American, so I truly believe in a separation of church and state. i believe that our Constitution was meant to protect the minority from the whims of the majority. I do NOT see any issue with this. I feel that as a Christian, fighting for HUMAN RIGHTS is a major part of why I am here. I also believe that the government should not be allowing the whims of "religious" hate mongers to prevent certain groups from participating in CIVIL ceremonies. I would never try to force a church to perform a gay wedding, I would never force a racist to perform an interracial wedding, but I DO expect officials to uphold the US Constitution and allow persons to exercise their UNALIENABLE rights, despite how I, or anyone feels about it. I feel that I am following in the footsteps of Christ when I stand up for those that are abused by members of our society that happen to be in the mainstream. Jesus hung out with the hated tax collectors, and at least one unclean woman.

I do not see why there is an issue with my questioning the things that do not make sense to me. But I guess because I try to get other perspectives on my questions some folks take it as the only reason I read is so that I can have more ammo to go against the "FAITH." it's not like that, I mean I read the Bible and there are some things that are at perfect peace with my heart, and there are others that are not. I feel that since I have been created with this mind, I can question things until they are explained in a satisfactory way. I'm so over it...this whole "religion" thing...I just wanna do me...why can't other folks just let me alone??

I'm sorry to ramble, but I had to put this out here so I could see it and get my words together before I attempt to go and make nice with my BFF...

Happy Honda (or Holi-, if you aren't in the market for a car) Days!

Had a blast with the buds! Just like high-school times, we were all sober the whole time! And folks(read: Ms. (im)Perfection) think i can't have fun without alcohol! Here's hoping the New Year brings less drama, and head-/heartache!!!

Bitch, We in da Bayou!!

So I have been going through! I am in jeopardy of losing my scholarship, and having to transfer to the local university. This is disheartening because I will basically be starting over, this potential school doesn't offer a major or a minor in African American Studies...which is what I'm majoring in now. Also, I will be living at home...so there will be no more partying, no friends, and no girlfriend(since she just transferred to my current school's sister school next door). I am so hurt by this because this is the semester I worked my hardest since coming to college, and to suffer such a set-back is beyond depressing. I don't have money, and I don't know if I'll be continuing my education the way I planned...life could be so much worse, I'm sure, but it feels really shitty right about now.

On another note: My family is so FOS...So I've been spending time with my one of my BFFs...and both of them are girls. My family tries to make me feel guilty about the amount of time I spend with them. They have brought it up before...and I've spoken to Ms. (im)Perfection about it...she said that she is fine with the amount of time I spend with them...especially because I see her at school now and only see them for a week or two every few months. I have even gone so far as to make sure I am home by 10 PM every time I go out with the BFFs...this is even when Ms. (im)Perfection is at work and unavailable to hang out with me...IDK, is it excessive to spend almost all day with my female best friends when my girl is at work? I think of them as like my similarly aged siblings, and I am only interested in making things work with Ms. (im)Perfection right now...

Tagged...yet, again.

So, I guess it's about time to start blogging again...and to start off...I'll make this list that I was tagged to do by Dbaby, and TGITG. I'm guessing that I am supposed to just list some random things about myself...IDK, really, but that's what it'll be.

7. I am really good at giving advice, but I'm horrible at following my own advice...hell, I rarely follow any advice...

6. I am a little lost now that I'm not basically the smartest person I know...it's kinda scary.

5. I sometimes wonder why my friends still bother to deal with me...I've realized I'm a mean ass bastard

4. I really feel torn about how to feel about being a virgin at 20...damn-near 21...especially when I'm closest to the folks who aren't virgins in my group...I hate feeling left out of the convos

3. I really Have NO clue what I'm to do in life...I see so many paths...but no clear roads...

2. I have damned food addiction...I'm seriously thinking that I might.

1. I like drinking, but i don't wanna...I'm scared I may be a worse parent than the ones I've seen...and I feel like alcohol will be the end of my "bright future" as folks like to call it...

Sometimes

This is inspired by a post I saw on The Baby Daddy Diaries.

Sometimes...I feel like a nut.
Sometimes...I don't.
Sometimes...I just wanna quit.
Sometimes...I wanna cry.
Sometimes...it's too hard.
Sometimes...I just have to laugh at it.
Sometimes...I wonder why.
Sometimes...I don't feel like answering the phone.
Sometimes...I just don't care.
Sometimes...I get sick of everyone.
Sometimes...I get sick of everything.
Sometimes...I want to be alone.
Sometimes...I'm overjoyed!
Sometimes...I need you around.
Sometimes...I feel undeserving of the blessings.
Sometimes...I just need to be myself.
Sometimes...I need to realize my own limits.
Sometimes...I care entirely too much.
Sometimes...I long for the days when I was carefree.
Sometimes...I smile for no (apparent) reason.
Sometimes...I need help.
Sometimes...I want to give up and go home.
Sometimes...I feel like a failure.
Sometimes...I feel so LOST!
Sometimes...i pray it through.
Sometimes...I feel so confused.
Sometimes...I feel like me...a blogger called Bobby_2010...

So life has soem great, funny moments...

and they are best when shared with friends! As I sit here "studying" (by which I mean, watching tv and surfing the net), I =keep seeing this Target commercial and I love the song they played in it, it's called More Where That Came From by Dolly Parton...and it is hilarious. I have posted the video below!

Wonderful Weekend

This weekend was a great! I mean it is actually the first time I can remember going each day of the weekend and not getting pissed at someone! I really had fun on Friday, with Upward Mobility, The Young Lady, and another friend, Naldo. We went to dinner and it was actually quite fun! and it's always fun to hang with fellow bloggers!! I got to speak to Drangry! I miss her dearly! I also spoke to Pink Blossoms and Dria da Diva! I can't wait to be reunited with these guys!! But back to Friday, I have realized I need sleep! I stayed up until 5:30 AM talking to Upward Mobility and Naldo...about nothing important! But I have come to appreciate being able to experience that sort fo thing, I mean we have come up with plans to take over the world...not just the city, but the World Craig(OOOPS! I mean reader), and it was quite fun!

I slept most of Saturday, When i did get up finally, it was to help the Artiste move into his new Apartment. And then to dinner, and then the Footbal game, whcih I'm happy to report, we won!! And then to the Bowling Alley! i bowled like 4, maybe 5 strikes, we only got up to 8 frames...i was pretty dang excited about those strikes!! And Lucky was trying to hate on my technique...WACK!! and then we went to Malpractice's Apartment, I really like his girlfriend...she is so nice!! But I still don't like being around him, b/c it makes me feel bad about how I act towards him. But I'm gonna try something new, just try to check my self...and keep our communication to a minimum, that way i don't have to worry about talking to him crazy!

I got up this morning and went to Church...it was amazing! and I should let you know why it was such a big deal, I have been questioning whther or not my personal values are in conflict with the values of the churches I have been attending, and whether that is reflective of the kinds of issues other folk go through when trying to reconcile progressive ideals with the inherently conservative(if nto regressive) tendencies of the Christian community. but I am trying to work thorugh it...pray for me!

It's Kinda Funny How Life Works...

I was sitting here reflecting on how much stuff has changed from when I first came to this school three years ago. I mean i had no friends, I was looking for a place to transfer to that would be closer to home. I had never had ginger ale before, I had never been to the South before, and I had never had to be without my family on Holidays.

Now I routinely drink ginger ale(usually mixed with other things, but it is good alone too!), I basic live in the South, I stay down here for at least 9 months of every 12, and I only spend three holidays with my family(Christmas, New Year's, and Memorial Day). I have sort of adopted a pseudo-family in my friends. I mean I spend more time with these sickos than I do with my actual family! I have grown to love folks that I loathed, I've had those falling-outs that all families have, and I have grown apart from some I was close to, and grown closer to some that i had distant relationships with at first. Things are changing, and I think all for the better.

I have been doing some introspection, and I have realized that I'm a horrible friend to Malpractice. I don't know exactly why, but I think it has ot do with jealousy(he is from a relatively wealthy family, and he's not a virgin; while I am from a poor family, and I am still a virgin). And since I'm such a bad friend to him, I feel even worse b/c his new girlfriend asked him if I was his best friend, and he said yes...I felt like shit!! And that just makes me dislike him more! I need help, btu really, he should just cut me loose, he shouldn't put up with this shit!

But on the other hand, Psych Ward and I have become like borthers, he confides in me and I in him. I think it may have something to do with our similar backgrounds, neither of us comes from money, and the current home situations aren't necessarily the best. But we are both determined to make it!

I think that this line of thinking, being mean and rude to the more well-off of my friends, and nicer, more caring to the less well-off among them, is a habit with me. I mean, IDK what is going on! I have some thinking to do, or maybe I should do some pruning, and cut folks out...btu that wouldn't solve anything, would it? I guess I have to do some soul searching...wish me luck.

It's the Small Things That Make Life Great

Last night about 11:45 me, Ms. (im)Perfection, Psych Ward, and Upward Mobility decided to go to get some of the best pizza I have ever had, from this local place. I mean the pizza was great, but the convo was wonderful!! I wish I could remember what it was about, but since we talk in circles and randomly select topics, I won't even hurt my self trying. I will say that I have the best folks on earth surrounding me! We have all changed so much, and I have learned that first impressions are usually misleading. because I definitely started off hating Psych Ward and Upward Mobility, and now they are some of my favorite people on earth!

I really wish that I hadn't wasted most of yesterday, I have a ton of work to do this weekend, a ton of reading, and I still need to do some laundry. I am such a SLACKER!!!!! I guess, I'll write more when i can clear my mind and put together real sentences.

O, BTW...Malpractice's Ex-gf, is a true bitch...her status was raw on Facebook: I laughed but then I thought about the fact that it was my boy, who had done everything he could to help her in her sick, twisted, and dimented life. And this chick has the nerve to write this:(insert name) hopes it's not dysfunctional this go round lmao I finally found someone who knows what the hell he's doing :-).
THEN she wrote this: let me stop lmao.

and THEN this: deon was right, a true man (....boy, really) could not do someone as dirty as he did. I can't be mad at no one but myself abd learn.

Now she says he did her wrong...he bought her a phone, let her move in with him, and then let her stay once they broke up...and then she talks all kinds of shit this summer, and now b/c he refuses to put up with her shit and has moved to another (real) woman she is acting funny...where do these crazy folks come from??

Friends...the Best people on Earth

Tell me why Meeks randomly called me to go shopping with her to get "school supplies" from this Art supply store that has been having some good sales. And the sale was pretty good...she spent much less than she had expected. But that is not the point of this! We shop, leave and decide to stop by her house before she drops me off and heads to school. As we are sitting at this light, a car pulls up next to us and a little boy in the front seat looks over at us and laughs, so we decide (independently) to "dance" and entertain this young man...when we both started dancing it to two completely different musical tempos...it was hilarious! I wish you had been there! I swear we made that little boy's WEEK..maybe even his month....too bad you can't say things like that!

Also, I just checked in for my Flight back down to the South. I've never done online check-in, it was interesting. I also found out that I can check a box...I thought "baggage" had to be bags...maybe I'm a little slow, but this is only the 10th flight I've taken in my life...and all the other times I was allowe to check two bags, and My big bag wasn't too big to check! So there( real kindergarten, right??)!

It's not so bad...

So, I'm basically alone in my hometown. I mean I have my family, but SHE is gone, as are all of my friends except for like one or two...and they are leaving in the next few days...so I have a whole WEEK left at home and nothing to do except go to breakfast with one of my high school classmates.

So I'm trying not to be upset that SHE is gone, because I mean she's going to the same place that I'll be in next Saturday, but HELL I wish she could've just left when I left! I guess she didn't really have a choice since she transfered to the Sister School and has to go to orientation. But I mean things are gonna get a lot better once I get down there, then we will not have all of the distractions and intruders that we have at home. Also, from now on SHE will be known as Ms. (im)Perfection. This is because her imperfections and eccentricities are what make us so compatible, and also kinda volatile. I helped her pack her truck today so she can drive down in the morning...well I guess to drive down in a few ours...I wish I could go with her, but my dorm does NOT open until the 24th...so I have nowhere to stay...and her momma ain't having that Bobby_2010 stay in the same hotel room thing. Also, her grandma, who loves me, threatened to come down to where we go to school and shoot up the entire city if I don't take care of Ms. (im)Perfection! And the crazy thing is, I kinda believe her! (Shivers, and teeth chatter)

Back to this friend that will still be here after all the others leave. He goes t the local university, and we met in 8th grade. Now I truly consider(ed?) him a friend, but this will be the first time I have ever hung out with him outside of a school function, a HIGH school function...I graduated three years ago. I mean...WTF is that about?? Anyway, I guess we are rectifying this...but it seems odd to me.I can't even imagine what the convo will be about as we eat breakfast...but I'm trying to come up with talking points, here are a few

• college life so far
• activities this summer
• career aspirations
  
• the presidential race (to my dear friends from school, and Sister School, he is a poli sci major, so this is appropriate)
• and that's about it...any ideas would be appreciated!

And tomorrow, I am supposed to go to breakfast with one of my friends from High school, DJ Hizway, he is a gospel rapper(is that the correct term??). He also serves as one of my principal spiritual advisers when i can't think of where to find some info. The thing is, when i first met him I hated him...and this was middle school. Then as high school went on, we had classes together and he was friends with one of my fave buds, so he sat by us. Then he got saved and shared his testimony with us, and this cemented our friendship. And we hang out every time he comes down to where I go to school, and whenever I go home(if he's in town). I must admit, he actually inspires me to do better...especially with my HORRID language! I mean he came to visit me and I think every other word was FUCK!!!! even when we were speaking about religious matters! that is when i started trying to curb my cussin'. (Now, please believe, that is still my word...but it doesn't have to be said constantly, right??)

goodnight, or morning?? I must sleep some before going to this breakfast!

enjoy the video below...I thought it was appropriate!

I swear, this is gone be the death of me!

So the Games of the 29th Olympiad are driving me up the wall already!! I mean, I am never really big on any sports except Track & Field usually...but I am living and dying with all of the American athletes...and I'm serious about dying...I almost died at like 3:00 this morning, watching that swimming relay where the French team said they were gonna smash us...I think not!!! I mean we were in first, then second, then third...and on that fourth leg...MAN, Jason Lezak tore into that French-bitch ass!!!! we snatched that shit right out they mouths!!! That's really His NAME told me about it...right as he was telling me it came on and I swear I wasn't breathing half the time! My eyes teared up from not blinking...it was crazy!!! you really have to watch this stuff(not to is just plain un-American...you can be investigated by the House of Representatives...FYI...don't go through all of that, just watch and cheer! it's the Amurkin way!!) Why did Pink Blossoms will the Black swimmer in the relay to stop breathing so much and speed up...hilarious!!!

In photo: Jason Lezak (who was the last leg and made the actual winning stroke), Cullen Jones(the second African American to have a gold medal in swimming), Garrett Weber-Gail, and (of course) Michael Phelps

So, me and Luncheon Loaf were watching the Olympic trials this summer during our internship, and we still send those random overjoyed text messages to each other. She is a gymnast so she really knows the stuff; I'm an Olympic watcher of gymnastics. And yet, i am sitting here yelping and texting her...and just having a near-nervous breakdown watching these men work their tails off on these apparati(is this a real word??)! BUT I wish these commentators would shut the fuck up writing team USA off! They are there because they can compete...if they were there to lose, they could have stayed home! So, sit back and shut that 'ole in your face (fave line from Titanic [the movie]).

I couldn't find a photo of the men's gym team...I'm still looking though!

What on earth is going on?

So I have been trying to get in touch with but Call me Felicia all damn
summer. Everytime I call it goes straight to voicemail. WTF?? I am kinda
worried about her, I really miss my buddy...do any of you guys know
what's up with her? If you hear from her, tell her I'm thinking about
her.

Update: FALSE Alarm...I just didn't get the text with the new number...b/c I was hab=ving phone issues back when it got changed....so move forward with your life, I am...lol
--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

things are DEFINITELY NOT as they appear!

Today was crazy, I didn't do anything until around 7, and then it was just to ride out into the rural parts with Meeks. After we finally made it back to the civilized urban jungle, we got lost a little and then when we got un-lost(is that english, real english??) and ran into a hell fo a traffic jam...and then rode completely out fo the way to get me back home...a harrowing experience to say the least.

So, when I got home FINALLY, I had a video chat with Drangry. This fool has started a blog...and it's crazy! We talked about her crazy life, and reminisced about the randomness that is (was) the CBCF 2008 internship.


I guess technically..I should go to bed so I can get started on laundry early this morning...so, I guess this is goodbye?!? NO, I won't say goodbye...I'll say goodnight...

I'm definitely the best friend I know!

I'm currently in the Burbs on local highways heading to Meeks's school to drop some of her junk off for her move in tomorrow. I just wanna say, rural parts ain't my fave place in the world, and suburbs ain't much better. Why the bffs can't go to school in cities? RURAL places are prime places for LYNCHINGS...am I the only one that knows this? I need to get back to the Safety of the 'hood ASAP! Pray for me please y'all!


Updated 2:54 AM 8/6/2008:So as we leave, i realize that where Meeks's school is not in the rural parts, it is actually a nice little city. But the road there and back was hella rural! and why on earth did we commence to telling stories about ax murderers and the Texas Chainsaw man sitting on the side of the row...and Meeks decides to check the backseat and the trunk...AFTER we have been on the road for 20mins already...we would have already been dead! And I was wondering how I, the most vocal of the scary movie yellers(you know what I mean, yelling at the White girl to get the hell up and steadily saying, "see, that's why Black folks don't get into shit like this...we know where to go...and we know to stay off of back roads at night!") got into this scary movie type shit!!! Praise be to Gawd, we made it back to civilization!!

Not So Lazy Sunday

Today I decided to go to church with My BFF, it's interesting. I have decided small churches just won't do anymore, I need a church where I can be anonymous, and this church ain't it! As soon as we walked in, folks started acting like me and her are dating...nothing could be further from the truth!

On another note, I have decided (yet, again) to try and lose eome weight. I mean for a while there I wasn't the only fat man in the family. But my cousin died, and all the others are slim or muscular now, so it looks like I have somethings to work out. And these folks don't eat anything special, they just play sports...maybe I'll be able to lose some playing tennis with her this school year, I also need to lift so that I can build muscle to burn fat.

Also, SHE came to Lil' Sis's b-day bbq and made a much better impression on the family, THANK Gawd! It would have been AAAWWWKKK-ward! But things are looking up, except for the fact that I still get nervous around her, what is that?? We started dating in like kindergarten (actually 9th grade, of and on) why am I still nervous around her? I have some issues I have to work out...looks like a conference with LC, Ty-P and Meeks!